I am a huge fan of Twitter.com, and have spent a lot more time on the site than I am ready to admit. If you haven't checked it out, I highly recommend, but in short - its a microblogging site, where you can post whatever you want in 140 characters or less.

Recently, having realized that he should have checked it out months ago, Senator McCain has started posting to Twitter.

Today, he was posting his "top ten" complaints with the President's budget. At #5, he posted, "SenJohnMcCain. $650K for beaver management in North Carolina and Mississippi. how does one manage a beaver?"

I reposted his twitter, and added, "Sir, if you have to ask...."

Later in the day, the "tweet" was edited to redact the inquiry into beaver management.

See me on twitter here.

Back with a vengance, its the Jersey Toddshow. I was all fired up tonight about Podcamp Philly, and the Podcasting community. The good, bad, and ugly is all here. (Well, I'm not sure about the ugly....)

Featuring

1. Walt Ribeiro
2. Jim Boggia
3. Linda Chorney
4. Koufax
5. Nelo
6. Jakob Martin

Listen to the show here

Buy these albums

 

Check out this nice email that I got from the boys at Woodfish.

'Hey Todd, I told the 95.9 WRAT to plug your podcast. They are pushing our show for this Saturday and I had them use a quote from, you, “They are just a lot of fun, with a mix of sounds and enthusiasm that is just infectious.” Plus it’s a nice plug for your podcast.

Now podcasting, is taking over FM.
 
Listen in tonight around 8:50; 9:50; 11:50 and tomorrow too. The times are not exact though'

 

 

     While the kids are away, JT shall play - the best podsafe music, that is. Featuring:

1. Reel Big Fish
2. Blue Number Nine
3. AM
4. Chris Belden
5. Nelo
   
6. Billie Holiday
   "That Ol' Devil Called Love" (mp3)
   from "Unique"
   (Global Journey)
   
   More On This Album

Special thanks to our Russian Commrades, Zack "The Mothman" Daggy, and my twitter friend, @dcb97.

Visit the Podiobook, "Crusade"

Check out the show here.


      After nine-months of baby world, we finally got out this weekend to see the brand new Indiana Jones flick. I am a huge Indiana Jones fan, and not a week goes by that an Indiana Jones quote doesn't enter into my daily routine. When I deal with insurance adjuster, you might get, a "snakes, I hate snakes" to the specials on the menu, "chilled monkey brains" to a "no time for love, Doctor Jones, we've got to go" when its time to...well actually, my wife says it to me, but she does a heck of a Short Round impersonation. "Very Funny, All Wet. Very Funny."
 
     I'm going to do my best to talk about the movie without ruining it for anyone. I don't think its any secret that the movie takes place approximately 10-years after the last one, and in 1957, the Nazi's and crazy Indian cult leaders are nowhere to be found. In this particular incarnation of the Indiana Jones saga, the bad guys are none other than the Red Menace themselves, the Russians.
 
     I enjoyed the movie. Well, not exactly. To quote the great American philosopher, Randall Jackson, "It was alright dog. It was just alright." There were parts that I liked and parts that well, frankly, made as much sense as Sophia Copolla in Godfather III. Its not that they wrecked the series or anything or destroyed the timeline, but it just kind of felt like an after-school special version of Indiana Jones. It had all the bells and whistles, just I didn't have the same emotional attachment to it. Maybe its cause I'm old and crotchety now. Or maybe from Jackie Chan to Bruce Willis, I've seen the formula now a billion times - the mouse being chased by the cat, who some how works it out in the end. Harrison Ford and Steven Speilberg weren't the first to come up with that idea...hmm Charlie Chaplin maybe....but they certainly perfected it.
 
     Now please, I am such an Indiana Jones head that I actually loved Temple of Doom. Everyone seems to pan it, including Speilberg. But to me, it was just creepy enough, just scary enough, just weird enough, to really work for me. So that being said, like the smart kid in the front of the class, I'd give Crystal Skull an A+ - not for its actual merit or its content, just because its so darn cute just sitting there in the front of the class with its hand up all the time.
 
     This is why, I was so disappointed, no that's not the right word, down right volcano red, steam coming out of the ears, popeye spinning his pipe, angry when I saw the following article this weekend. "Commuinists say that Indiana Jones should be banned in Russia for "Anti-Soviet" Propaganda." I quote - "Harrison Ford" and Cate Blanchett (are) second-rate actors, serving as the running dogs of the CIA. We need to deprive these people of the right of entering the country," said party member, Andrei Gindos. Party member Viktor Perov said: ' What galls is how together with America we defeated Hitler, and how we sympathised when Bin Laden hit them. 'But they go ahead and scare kids with Communists.'    
     
     Vladimir Mukhin, another member of the local Communist Party, said in comments posted on the Internet site that he would ask Russia's Culture Ministry to ban the film for its "anti-Soviet propaganda."
 
     This is not the first time that these Russians have had something to say about American films.  In 1998 the Russian parliament demanded the government explain why the Hollywood film "Armageddon" - which depicted a dilapidated Russian space station that blows apart because of a leaky pipe -- was allowed onto Russian cinema screens. A government official at the time said the film, "mocked the achievements of Soviet and Russian technology."
 
     Indeed, in 2004, they posted the following. "The Notebook. Loved it. Two snaps and a bag of chips. That Ryan Gosling sure can warm up a cold winter's night."
 
     All I have to say to my Russian Comrades. Really? Oh really? Is that where we're going here. You guys have some real stones, don't you? May I remind you one thing - you lost the Cold War. Its over, baby. My lord, there's an Apple Store on the Red Square. There's a Starbucks in the ol' KGB Building. You don't hear the Confederate Army doing movie reviews. You don't hear the Nazi party doing a piece on Access Hollywood. Face it Boris, you've got absolutely no standing to even issue a frickin press release on this isssue.
 
     Here's a riddle for you. Who's buried in Lenin's Tomb? The answer: Who cares? I mean really, the Communists were scary to me somewhere between Red Dawn and Nikolai Volkoff. I mean you've got Sean Connery losing one of your nuclear subs, then what does that say about you as third-rate former Superpower?
 
     Oh wait, Sean Connery, that was just a movie, and sure he was a haircut away from having the exact same accent in "Rising Sun" - but isn't that my point. Its just a damn movie. Its a money maker. I can't think of how many Russians are going to be deprived the opportunity to eat popcorn and sip vodka from a Pepsi container, which is exactly the way that I saw Chris Farley's Black Sheep, but that's a story for another day.
 
     If your education system is worth half a potato, Russian kids can separate fact from fiction. Indeed, I can't imagine any kid, of any culture, actually thinking that these were accurate events of 1957. Maybe John McCain, but not Russian kids. They're smarter than that.
 
     Its a smoke screen. Its mirrors. Its special effects. I'm not saying the movie, I'm saying - the Russian government. They've got more problems than downtown Little Rock, Arkansas, and maybe half the BBQ restaurants. By these Russian nimrods wasting valuable spotlight time for something stupid as this, well that's just sad. I dunno, deal with your own terrorist problems. Deal with your own burgeoning economy. I dunno maybe make your own damn movie. Comrade Smith and One-Legged Mule. I don't care one bit. In fact, the whole free exchange of ideas did more to bring down Communism than Victoria Secret Catelogs and Hershey's Kisses. I'm sure the Victoria's Secret catalogues didn't hurt, but the whole idea of banning a movie just because you disagree with the content just sticks in my craw. The whole thing just comes off as sour grapes. Capitalism didn't kill Communism. Communism killed communism. Because at the end of the day, people don't want their government to tell them what they can and can't do.
 
     Russia has been, and continues to be one of the places that I'd like to visit someday. I've got family ties to Russia. Yeah, my family was tied up by Russians when they were living in Germany. No I kid, I'd love to go to Russia. Its like visiting Syracuse but without the sunshine once a week. Oh stop, don't get me started about Russian food - its great if you like cold beets. Stop, don't get me started - we all know that our supermodels are smarter than their supermodels. Wait, actually, both sets of supermodels are dumber than a bag of rocks. My point is that, I'm kidding. I'd love to visit Russia someday. Of course, if I can't go to a Russian movie theater and order a gallon of popcorn, a supersized Coke, some Jujibees and some junior mints.
 
    Well, then I'm just gonna stay home.  
     
     
   

Ok, we're back in the swing of things, with another show back at you very quickly. Tonight, featuring:

1. Made for Chickens by Robots
2. Joe Colledge
3. The Radio Knives
4. Black Ice (Featuring Ice-T and Black Silver)
5. Neal Fox
6. JJ Appelton

Check out UC Radio Podshow and the Podcast Junky

Download the show here

Listen to the show here

   Are you ready for a little mystery? Some magic? Some Wizardry? Well, don't expect any of that crap here. Ever since Groo the Caveman Magician first sold his first ticket in the cave to charge admission to have the other cavemen watch him try to make a Stegosaurus disappear, the real magic has been about the ability of a performer making money disappear from your pocket. Interesting story about Groo the Caveman Magician: yeah, he lost his arm doing the old "let me pull a veloceraptor from my hat" trick - don't worry, he got Workers' Comp. for it, which I think back then entitled him to an extra few berries from the insurance carrier. 

     Yeah, I'm a cynic. Yeah, I question everything. Sure, I wonder how long that rabbit has been crammed in that hat, and secretly laugh to myself every time that nobody ever makes the magician put that hat full of poop on their head once the rabbit is pulled out.

     That's why when one of the world's greatest purveyors of all things magical, J.K. Rowlings was outed this week as the absolute Muggle that she really is, it just warmed the cockles of me heart.

 
     You know J.K., she's the author of all of the Harry Potter books. He's a wizard, you know. Its all about magic. Yeah, I'll admit that I've never actually read any of the Harry Potter books, but I have been dragged to all of the movies. Look, I'm not going to beat up a book that makes kids read - I mean that's a good thing. Hopefully, someday they'll move on to other great science fiction like J.C. Hutchins or Bradbury, or Orson Scott Card's Enders Game. Oh, Enders Game, published years before Harry Potter, its a story about A young kid growing up in an oppressive family situation suddenly learns that he is one of a special class of children with special abilities, who are to be educated in a remote training facility where student life is dominated by an intense game played by teams flying in midair, at which this kid turns out to be exceptionally talented and a natural leader. He trains other kids in unauthorized extra sessions, which enrages his enemies, who attack him with the intention of killing him; but he is protected by his loyal, brilliant friends and gains strength from the love of some of his family members. He is given special guidance by an older man of legendary accomplishments who previously kept the enemy at bay. He goes on to become the crucial figure in a struggle against an unseen enemy who threatens the whole world. Oh, yeah, the kids are really going to love it when they grow up and read that one....Actually, I have to give credit to Uncle Orson who pointed out the similarity on that one, of course. Of course, you could throw the whole Star Wars mythos into that mix or Sabrina the Teenage Witch for that matter too. Ah Melissa Joan Hart in Maxim magazine. It always does come back to that for me, doesn't it.

    What ticks me off about J.K. is the hypocrisy of her. The official story is that she was suffering from clinical depression and was suicidal while she was writing the initial Harry Potter stories. Sad. She was a single unemployed mother living in a fantasy world and hoping to get her book published. Notwithstanding the fact, that she, as opposed to millions of other potential authors got lucky and got hit by a lightening bolt between her eyes and had fate smile upon her and got her book published, I gotta tell you - I think you can take the nut out of the nutty situation, but you still have an absolute wack job.

    Good ol' Jo is still living in a fantasy world, but now she has something worse than Dementors working for her. She's got something worse than Voldermort working for her. She's got an evil pack of lawyers working for her.

    First, she's suing a little publishing house in Michigan for attempting to publish a 400-page Lexicon which catelogs the Potter universe. Its an extension of a fan website that she herself gave an award to. You know, it goes through the characters and the spells and is as interesting to read to most adults as the backstory on Pokemon. Now that the authors want to publish some pseudo-scholarly material about it, she sends out a Freeze spell to try to stop it. In fact, they took some testimony on this. On the stand, her main complaint is that she believes that she would do a better job doing it herself. Oh please, Jo-Jo. You have got to be kidding me. Go ahead and do it yourself. Once you publish fiction, pretty much anyone is able to do anything they want to do with it as long as they attribute it back to you, which these fine folks have tried to do. Jesus, how many 4th grade book reports does she now have to go after. I dunno what the statute of limiations is on those kind of things, but if I were a 4-th grade teacher its time to start ratting out the students to the publishing company every time one of those Potter book reports come in - why not, teachers don't make enough money and neither you nor I want our taxes raised, so come on teachers - get creative.

    This week, she got a Court ruling allowing her to sue journalists in London because they took a picture of her kid with a telephoto lens and published it. The original court tossed that puppy quicker than you can say Shazam, but now an Appeals Court has said that the children of famous parents have the same right to expect privacy as the children of parents who are not well known. The case stems from a picture that was published in a newspaper of David Rowling being pushed on a buggy on a street when he was a baby, and sets the stage for a trial over damages.
 

    Now, I can't claim to be an expert in British law, and I certainly don't want to get into the poor, horrible state of privacy of our great and public celebrities, but I have no idea what these Judges were thinking. In fact, based on same, I don't give any credence to any British Judge who's last name isn't Cowell. I agree that the children of celebrities have a certain right to privacy. I agree that there is an inherent security concern here, but come on. The kid was probably surrounded by a phalanax of security guards, and was on a public street. You, I, and the rest of the muggles out there have absolutely no right to privacy on a public street. That's actually what its called - public, and if Rowlings didn't want to be in the public eye then I don't know, maybe she needs to travel by broom or something. Hell, the Court's ruling doesn't seem to make any sense, because I have no expectation that if I take my kids to a frickin sheep sheering event at our local dairy farm and some Jimmy Olsen wants to take a picture, then frankly I should be entitled to a free copy of the paper and that's it.

    At the end of the day, where is she really going with this - she's a billionaire already. Damages? What in the world is little David Rowling's measure of damages. Uhm, dude, you looked like a baby in the picture. We all have baby pictures. You're mom is a billionaire. What exactly is J.K. Rowling's 5-year old kid going to do with damages? I'm not saying that celebrity kids aren't entitled to go to Court, but the purpose of the Civil justice system in both the US and Englandia is to make an aggreived party whole. As such, I think you have to award damages in this matter, if its found to be compensable which I've said I already disagree with, in the the terms that would make a reasonable 5-year old feel as if he received justice - that's right - the horrible, evil newspaper, should provide him with a DVD of Dora the Explorer and a Juice Box.
    

    Jeez, do you think that the newspapers are really going to learn a lesson about this. Hell, by suing little book manufacturers or little newspapers Rowling's actually giving them more free advertising than she ever intended to do. Frankly, here's my two cents on it. We have, by her own admission, a bit of a nut job who somehow gets lucky in writing these books and all of a sudden her life has meaning and credibility beyond her wildest fantasies. You remember all of the talk about whether Harry Potter would get killed in the last book. I don't want to ruin it for anyone, but uhm, there was no way in the universe that he was gonna die because there would be absolutely no possibility of another book, which is 100% going to happen as soon as J.K. Rowlings realizes that she can't write her way out of a paper bag on any other subject. Oh yeah, Soylent Green is people. Kaizer Souze is Kevin Spacy, Bruce Willis is actually dead, and the Cloverfield monster looks like Dick Cheney's wife. Any other endings you want me to hit. jerseytoddshow@gmail.com

     In the end, J.K. Rowling was once accused of making the Harry Potter books to support witchcraft. I think that's ridiculous, of course. Its always a great thing when kids read. But now that she's shot her literary load, and is floundering around looking for some sort of purpose in life, perhaps its best she send the lawyers back to the hell from wence they came.

    Being accused of witchcraft is one thing, but bitchcraft...that's another story.

 

   

Playing hooky? Not me...I'm podcasting. Featuring

1. The Ike Reilly Assasination
2. The Bangkok Five
3. The Animate Objects
4. The Dan Sheehan Conspiracy
5. Mark Rudd
6. Mobile

Featuring Howitzer

Go visit: Digital Flotsam and the Electrical Language Podcast

Download or play the show here

       Want a little gossip? Want a little rumor, some innuendo? I'm gonna tell you a little secret. On June 29, 2007, the straightest governor in New Jersey history, Jon Corzine appointed. Anne Milgram as the Attorney General. Oh she is such a babe, shes a good lawyer, and well, for purposes of her tapping my phone lines and otherwise investigating this podcast - she's got a tremendous sense of humor.

    But she is the head of Jersey Todd's favorite former employer, the New Jersey Division of Law and Public Safety and they have found an issue that affects the lives of all New Jerseyians, so much, so much, that even if it means involving precious State resources and legal brain power, even if it means making a New Jersey a national laughing stock, we're gonna go for it. Because its not about flawed voting machines, or tax reform, or education reform, or even, crime. No, the first Attorney General of the State of New Jersey that is actually younger than yours truly has sent her minions to attack the one thing that no lawyer has ever done really all that well dealing with....gossip.

     Did this one hit you at rumour city, did you catch this on the grapevine, did you catch the scuttlebutt? The nation's most smokin' Attorney General Anne Milgram, has sent some subpoenas out to the folks at Juicycampus.com, and some of their advertisers. And let me just say, in my best Colbert impersonation, that extra "E" on the end of Anne's name - that stands for "Excellent". Juicy Campus is a website that allows for visitors to post anonymous comments about people at colleges. You can post who's the biggest campus slut, and who's the dumbest professor, and you can do it all anonymously. I know these kids in college today all have it so easy. When I was at Syracuse in the nineties, we all knew that the campus slut was some girl named "Bullet-head" which was really odd because I never even knew her real name, I just heard some wacked out story about her at some fraternity party which involved some football players and small animals. Of course, I didn't hear the story until like May of my Senior year, and I have no idea why her nickname was "Bullethead", and even in my over-exposed to bad pornography brain, I still don't get the joke. However, you college kids with your fancy technology got us old men beat in the important information department. I dunno, when I was in school, all you had to do was ask someone. Its all a bit juvenille.

     Except when its not so juvenile. My secret crush, Anne, got involved with juicy-campus.com when a Princeton's University student's private information got posted on their website. This is not good. When the kid tried to get it off their site, their was no mechanism for them to do so. Now Juicy-campus tell their advertisers that they ban offensive material, but, uhm not really. It's kind of like putting out a suggestion box without actually having that little slot in the box to actually put the suggestions in. The problem is that many of the postings on juicy-campus are so malicious that students are afraid they will affect their real lives as Google continues to serve up search results to future employers and family members. Many students have complained that Juicy-Campus refuses to remove false statements about them, and the site isn't exactly gaining points among student organizations, school administrations, and lawmakers in general.  

     The AG's office sent out a flurry of subpoena to juicy-campus and their advertisers under the New Jersey Consumer Fraud Act asking questions about the site, asking about how they get their ad revenue and how the jammy-jam is thrown together. The NJ Consumer Fraud Act deals with information in terms of a commercial transaction. If you had a highlighter, I'd ask you to take it and put a big yellow line through your screen and highlight that sentence - its going to be important later.

     Juicy-campus, through their public relations folks, raised holy hell in a press release this week stating that they've broken no laws, and that they are immune from civil liability due to the actions of their users. They've called the investigation "absurd" Yeah yeah, we're impressed tough guys. Maybe Juicy-campus shouldn't retain the public relations firm that is located in the mall somewhere next to Orange Julius and H.R. Block. These guys are doing more harm than good. 
 

"'Juicy-Campus has not violated any laws. Juicy-Campus is immune under federal law for liability arising from statements made by others. The Attorney General of New Jersey , who apparently is not a fan of the Site, know this and are instead taking the position that by asking our users not to post content that is unlawful, abusive or defamatory, among other things, we are somehow required to remove posts that may fall into those categories. They contend that by failing to do so, we have defrauded our users.' (emphasis added)'"

     They are like, so, not getting it. This is absolutely 100% not a First Amendment issue. Apparently, Juicy-campus was so hopped up on diet coke and chocolate bars just waiting for someone to go after them on a First Amendment issue - like whether they can be held liable in a civil court if someone actually got hurt as a result of something posted on their site, not that they actually should care about that, that like Jo-bu from "Major League" they couldn't hit the curve ball that was thrown at them.

     This is a really developing and interesting area of the law and frankly juicy-campus shouldn't be so smug. Under Section 230 of the Communications Decency Act, "No provider or user of an interactive computer service shall be treated as the publisher or speaker of any information provided by another information content provider." Ok, that's fine, and a case that came out of Texas, in 2007, called Doe v. My-space actually held My-space immune from liability for failing to institute safety measures to prevent sexual assaults of minors and failure to institute policies relating to age verification. It didn't mean that My-space didn't get off their ass and make some major changes to their site in terms of age verification and monitoring their comments, and maybe that was done for the legal end, but it was also done to satisfy those funky market forces, like their advertisers that don't want to besmirch their otherwise pristine reputations.  In fact, companies like Google and Adbrite have refused to take Juicycampus' money.

    Doe v. My-space is only a decision from a District Court in Texas, and I wouldn't doubt for one second that the victim in that case, a 14-year old girl who was sexually assaulted after meeting someone on my-space isn't moving that case forward through the Court system, and I'm sure that some grandstanding legislator won't be using this story at some point to revise the rules of the CDA. Stay tuned kids, the law is going to change on this one right before our eyes, and its going to affect everyone on the net, and in the spirit of the March Madness season let me do my best Dick Vitale and make a prediction. The Supreme Court baybee, they're gonna be cleaning the Boards on this one. John Roberts, he's a diaper dandy. They're gonna take the CDA downtown. That Ruth Bader Ginsburg, RBG, is gonna throw the alley oop, and the Supreme Court is someday going to say that places like myspace or facebook or juicy campus is going to have to at the very least monitor their own sites for bad behavior.

     In the end, let me whisper something in the ear of those kids at Juicy-campus. This is not a First Amendment issue. As of today, the CDA says that Anne M. can't go after them over content. Even though these Juicy-campus.com permits and, in my humble opinion, encourages its users to post some awfully racist and sexist stuff and provides them absolute anonymity to do so. No, the AG can't send a few flying monkeys from her lair to check into that. So, she's investigating the relationships between Juicy-campus and their advertisers, and whether JC accurately told their advertisers how the site worked when they gave in some money to advertise on the site. Already, one advertiser has pulled their ads from the site, and if there is any other material misrepresentation going on here where money is exchanged Juicy-campus may have a lot of explaining to do, and perhaps Juicy-campus should lose its flippant attitude. Trust me, its Ms. Milgram if your nasty, and this is nasty. This is the Web 2.0 equivalent of going after Al Capone over tax evasion rather than his substantive crimes, and as we say in Joisey - you mess with the bull, you get the horns.  

oh....and how 'bout this:

 

Two shows in one week? Who do I think I frigging am, Adam Curry? Featuring:

Intro Music: Josh Woodward

1. Ember
2. Goodwin
3. David Ippolito
4. Chris Trapper of the Push Stars
5. Funky Kidz
6. David Martin

Go buy Number One with a Bullet

Listen to the show here

"Who can take someone's trademark, spin it for me and you? Cover it with choc'late, and a miracle or two. The Candy Man, oh the Candy Man Can. The Candy Man cause he mixes it with love and makes the world taste good..."

Wait wait wait, before you hit that button on your ipod, before you run screaming from your computer, I apologize. I know, I've gotten countless emails from you in the past, but I just had the need, the need to sing. It comes to me every once in awhile when I get happy. In fact, I'm a singing fool half the time, and well, I just had to bust a tune out for you.

The reason why I'm so happy is this story out of New York City, which was in the paper today. In Times Square, which I consider to be the exact epicenter of the entire world is a guy named David Burck. Don't go looking for him now. It's too cold out, but when the time is right David performs, as, what he believes to be one of New York's top tourist attractions - the Naked Cowboy. That's right, the dude lets it all hang out in his underwear and a cowboy hat and sings. He kind of positions his guitar over his instrument if you know what I mean. Look, I don't go in for that kind of entertainment - when I'm in Times Square I'd rather go get a hot dog over at Nathan's or maybe just get some hot nuts from a street vendor. Oh wait that came out wrong. Some people have a great time with him. He's kind of a David Ippolito type if David lost the pants and wore a cowboy hat. I hate to drag David into this - go check out his web site at thatguitarman.com and listen to his podcast, because he's wonderful. But in thinking about it, there certainly are a lot of guys in the city without shirts and guitars. My friend Ahmed who sells sun tan lotion for 1-dollar, 1-dollar certainly must be making a killing.

But Burck has got his tighty-whitey's in a bunch because those fiends at M&M Mars recently put an electronic billboard up with a M&M wearing underwear and playing guitar, and it looks really a lot like the Naked Cowboy, and at first, then Burck was really honored, and then someone must have whispered in his ear that the M&M was potentially impinging upon his trademark and he filed a lawsuit in Federal District Court seeking $6 million dollars, which of course, is a boat load of skittles. Yeah, the ultimate case of deep pocket versus no pocket.

Now I am not a copyright lawyer, but you know, it is interesting that we keep coming back to stories of how celebrities rights are violated. Ah, poor celebrities. I don't know who is advising the Naked Cowboy, but if he procedes with a trademark claim against Mars, he might lose his shirt. Oh wait, he already did.

More importantly, I have no idea how he's going to serve the M&M's with his papers. I guess he's going to have to get some sort of teeny-weeny process server in M&M land.

I'm not sure if this actually falls under a trademark claim. If you want to get fancy, its the Lanham Act, put into place back in the Truman era. Back when men were men, and candies weren't required to defend against lawsuits. But, I don't know if Burck actually trademarked his BVD's and if he did, where would he put the little trademark symbol? More importantly, applying for and receiving a trademark is really really expensive, and I just have my doubts that the Naked Cowboy applied for one using the quarters and dollar bills from his guitar case.

So, the paper must have gotten it wrong - this is more likely a copyright claim. Celebrities in the United States enjoy the right of publicity  The right of publicity essentially means the celebrity’s right to the commercial value of their fame. It is considered ‘additional to and independent of the right to privacy’. A person’s name, image or other aspects of personality cannot be used on merchandise without his or her consent. For example, Vanna White successfully sued Samsung Electronics, when it used a Vanna White look-a-like robot in one of its advertisements, without her permission. This was so despite the fact that no-one could have possibly been confused that the robot was really Vanna, and I doubt that anyone is going to think that the M&M is actually Burck. Its not like the M&M had nuts. 

The first problem is that this guy is going to have is proving that as the Naked Cowboy that he is really some sort of celebrity. I mean seriously, everyone in this country is famous for something or another, and is celebrity just someone who has his butt seen by a lot of people? Does celebrity mean a side show act or basic cable? I mean come on, Burck is essentially a glorified street perfomer. He's a guy waiting for the bus. The guy isn't a celebrity, and in this weather, he's a lunatic.

Is what he does so unique, so special, that he even deserves copyright protection? My three year old sings in his underwear, and frankly, he does a better job of the Chipmunk's "Witch Doctor" than that Cowboy dude...but more importantly, does anyone think any differently after seeing the ad? Does anyone think that the Naked Cowboy is endorsing M&Ms? Would it matter more if it were a green M&M? If so, who really cares? 

It's not like I'm going to purchase something hard on the outside and chocolatey on the inside just because a Naked Cowboy tells me to. Ok, that came out really wrong sounding. To be honest, I probably wouldn't purchase something hard on the outside and chocolatey on the inside if presented by a Naked Cowboy - this is especially true if the Naked Cowboy wanted to tell me that it would melt in my mouth and not in my hands. Dude - get away from me. Is this really the future of marketing? What's next Jenna Jameson for Star-Kist? Think about that one, you'll laugh at it later. 

And in the end, and frankly, I've seen the end, its nothing that's too impressive, what exactly is this guy's measure of damages? A roll of bus tokens? C'mon. For $6 million bucks, this guy could give up being the Naked Cowboy altogether. Frankly, I think he's doing what he's done all along pushing skimpy briefs in all of our faces, and hoping to make a quick buck. Frankly, I hope that no attorney gets involved with this case and tries to procede pro boner because I wouldn't want this case to end up in a hung jury. Ok, again, nasty image, so lets wrap this one up.

It appears to me that the Naked Cowboy is just trying to squeeze M&Ms for a couple of bucks, and even though I realize that he has nowhere but his boots to stuff the money in, if I'm the defense attorney on this one, I'd offer a sincere, "I'm sorry", maybe tell my client not to renew the billboard at the end of its run, and well, maybe tell them to go ahead and give the guy enough money to buy a coat.

Another show, featuring your favorite ambulance chaser. Featuring:

1. The Black Crowes
2. Mama's Cooking
3. 32Ounce
4. Kristin Kitko
5. Elisa Peimer
6. Rick Barry

Download or listen to the show here

Listen to the Bartycast

Featuring PJ73 (Pedromontera)

        This holiday season, my wife's 87-year old grandfather announced that he is planning on taking the LSAT's. For you civilians out there, the LSATs stand for the Law School Admission Test, and are the test that every law student has to endure as part of the admission process into law school. It is a weird, esoteric, test, that like most things in law school has absolutely nothing to do with the actual practice of law.

     The worst part is, that while everyone is partying during their last year of college, a typical prospective law student is holed up taking more classes, and driving themselves absolutely bonkers. Because they build this test up to be the be-all-end all. Its the difference between a good law school, and having to apply to Cooley Law School in Detroit, which has a rolling admission policy. I think they gave me a start date of 2015, which is nice.  

       Let me give you a sample LSAT question. They give you the most ridiculous fact pattern.

      An amusement park roller coaster includes five cars, numbered 1 through 5 from front to back. Each car accommodates up to two riders, seated side by side. Six people—Tom, Gwen, Laurie, Mark, Paul and Jack—are riding the coaster at the same time. Laurie is sharing a car. Mark is not sharing a car and is seated immediately behind an empty car. Tom is not sharing a car with either Gwen or Paul. Gwen is riding in either the third or fourth car.

        The first question typically involves something to the effect of: Which of the following groups of riders could occupy the second car?
.
(A) Laurie only
(B) Tom and Gwen
(C) Laurie and Mark
(D) Jack and Tom
(E) Jack, Gwen, and Pau

 
     Now frankly, questions like this used to drive me absolutely nuts. I mean I have no idea why this has anything to do with the actual practice of law. All it does is teach you to draw little diagrams, and all it really shows is that you are an absolute wiz-bang test taker. Frankly, when I was applying for law school, I would have been better evaluated by playing beer pong or zonk.

     Lets work through it together: Who could occupy the second car? And this is really how my mind works. They tell us that Laurie is sharing a car, because she's a slut, so that means letter "A" is out. "B" Tom and Gwen - well they tell me that Tom is not sharing a car with either Gwen or Paul. Because well, Tom is a little funny if you know what I mean, and Paul isn't his type. Regardless, it means that Tom and Gwen aren't having a threesome in the third car of a roller coaster, which while this sounds fun, does not meet state and federal safety regulations. "C" Laurie and Mark. Well, they tell me that Mark is not sharing a car, because Mark, well is Mark, and we know what to say about him. But that being said, answer "C" Laurie and Mark is completely out, because well, Mark, doesn't like to share. Don't read too much into that one. Ok, so that leaves us with "D" Jack and Tom. Boy, they sound preppy don't they? Well, they say that Tom is not sharing a car with Gwen or Paul. Ok, unless Jack is a cross dresser, he and Tommy can canoodle their whole way through the loops. So, I'm liking D. And E - well the Answer is never E. Its just a superstition I have. E is always the bullshit one. I've probably been wrong with that - but let me see - E wants me to put Jack, Gwen and Paul in a car, but they already told me that the cars only hold two people, so "E" was trying to "F" with my head again. So, obviously, the Answer has to be "D" - Jack and Tom, the two preppy, closeted guys, holding hands on the roller coaster.

      Ok, so, this is why I did miserable on the LSATs. Not horrible mind you. Let's just say that I didn't get into Hah-vahd with my scores. Lets just say, my law school was on such a low tier that there were actual former inmates in my criminal procedure class going, "Damn! Why didn't my attorney think of that?"  Ah, Jerome, you were such a good guy. I hear that he's doing 7 to 10 in Pennsy., for assault for something that happened after he passed the bar. Guess you shouldn't have taken that day off to watch the Basketball tournament, huh?

     I mean, I'm not going to say that my law school was bad, but, I swear to gd I'm not making this up, but one of my professors used to start every lecture with, "This case comes to us from the Supreme Court, as you know I lost there." or "This case comes to us from the District Court, and as you know, I lost there, too." Seriously, I was waiting for day for him to come in to class and say, "This case comes to us from the Customer Service desk at Home Goods, and as you know I lost there, too."

      You see, the LSAT's are made for people with strategic, logical minds. Because, as we know, all succesful lawyers and law students should have the exact same skills and experiences coming into law school. Yeah, apparently, that's not how my mind works. In fact, a question like the one above should take a normal prospective law student about a minute to figure out. I would sit there for a good ten minutes and wonder why exactly was that bitch Laurie sitting with Jack, and debating why three guys would take two girls to an amusement park, and trying to figure out which guy is the loser. My guess - Tom. But that's just a guess. Tom is such a tool.

      I know, that cost me ten-minutes. But like so much of law school testing, there is no room for creative thought. There is an old story going around about the law student who was asked in a Contracts exam to discuss the legal implications of a ticket to go to a baseball game. Because, as you know, there is a ton of goodness on the back of any ticket for a sporting event - waiving everything from your right to sue them, to your right to buy beer after the seventh inning. Well, the rumor is, that that the genius of a law student just wrote "Game Cancelled Due to Rain" in the essay book and handed it in. Now I don't know what ever happened to that dude, but the rumor is that he is now the Chief Justice of the Supreme Court - or maybe not.

      I fought law school, and man oh man, did the law win. I never really wanted to actually do the course work in the way that they wanted me to. I took those 400 Page law books, and went through them like a copy of the Encyclopedia Britanica. I mean, lets get to the good stuff....why do I have to wait six-weeks to start reading about murder and mayhem. Hell, I'll take Truman Capote over Prosser on Torts any day of the week.

     But, that's not the way the way that the powers that be wanted it, and while a lot of kids ended up on the "Dean's List" I ended up on the "Dean's Other List" - you know the one where they make you take extra classes on Saturdays with some really arrogant 3rd year student. Of course, at my school, there was always talk about these tutors being on something called community service or work release, but I never really understood the whole background of that.

      Ultimately, they broke me. They broke me down. I learned how to play their game. It was somewhere after they cashed my first check of the second semester, and to be really honest, I didn't really realize how to play the spit-it-back-to-them game until it was time for the bar exam, when I sat on my deck all day and had a beard worse than Letterman's new face rug.

      So, to my grandpa-in-law, I have some advice about taking the LSATs. First, stick to the question. While Laurie, Tom, Jack, and Paul certainly appreciate your concern for their day at the amusement park, apparently, and I didn't realize this - they aren't real people. So, you might as well just answer the question and move on to the next wacky question of which type of fish is going on a northbound train, or something like that. Second, the LSAT, like law school, is not an accurate measuring tool to determine succesful lawyers. Its just another endurance test, another pledge event that allows you to get to the big fraternity mixer that is the practice of law, where you someday learn that the beer is always warm, and being a pledge is really the most fun of actually joining the fraternity. Oh, and here's the most important piece of advice:

      The Answer is never (E), and if all fails, there's always Cooley Law School.

       But who wants to live in Detroit?

 

 

A little raspy, a little tired, a little bit country, and a little bit rock n'roll. It's the JTS featuring:

1. Blood Red Sun
2. Suns of March
3. Jamesking
4. Elisa Peimer
5. LoFi Pioneer
6. Colie Brice

Featuring DJ Suicide

Checkout Transistor Rodeo

Listen to the show here.

        When Pope John Paul II died a few years back, I like you, was more than happy to enter into the speculation of who would become the new Pope. It was like Survivor-meets-the Biggest Loser meets that wacky religious channel that comes on when I'm clicking my remote somewhere between TNT and Comedy Central. I mean, as a Jewish guy, my knowledge of the international clergy is as in depth as the next Olympic Speed Skating Team, but for that brief time I was an expert in the pros and cons of the new Pope like we were discussing the style and grace of Anton Ono, because you know when the Olympics come around I am an absolute knock 'em dead expert in these kind of things. What the Olympics are what, every three years, who knows? Trust me, daddy loves the luge.

    But in regard to the Papal Erection, I mean Election - sure, sure, I had my favorites. There was the wacky Chinese cardinal, the boring looking hispanic Cardnial that looked like he should have been serving paella in Newark, the fat jolly Italian one that kind of looked like my butcher. The one with the haircut that looked like Moe from the Three Stooges. Oh wait, they all kind of had that haircut. But, the web did a great job putting up these guys bio information, and these guys were impressive - one cardinal saved a leper colony, one cardinal bathed the poor, one cardinal was Lindsey Lohan's drug and alcohol counselor. I mean these are some people with some gravitas.

     I was surprised, and shocked and also out ten dollars, when Cardinal Ratzinberger was named to be the next Pope. I had him picked as a 20-1 shot - he was my Gonzaga of the Papal Four, but hey sometimes someone gets lucky in these kind of things. My wife generally chooses her Final Four by the colors of the team uniforms, but that didn't work in this situation as all the Cardinals wore red.     But I have always been a bit skeptical of this particular Pope. I mean there's something shady about him. I mean sure, having a Pope from Germany makes the little hairs on my tallis stand at attention, and at the end of the day, this guy seemed to have as compassion of Woodsy the Owl.
     
      But look, back at the end of 2006, I made some promises. I made some resolutions if you will, and one of those resolutions is not to offend anyone on this show based on their religious beliefs, and if this particular Pope floats your boat, then who am I to criticize?

     So, that being said, I had to talk to you about the latest out of Pope Benny to the X-to-the-V-izzy-to-the-Izzy. Thats XVI to you folk or as they say in Latin - XVI. Nonetheless, Big B is coming out with a big speech on World Peace Day which is on January 1. Frankly, I don't know why we're holding a Peace day on the day that all of the good college bowl games are on, because frankly, I think that's a pretty peaceful day. No if I were to choose World Peace Day, I'd have to say it'd have to be the day when they say that Britney Spears is doing the 2-shift at the local Walmart, because on that particular day the universe will be back in realignment and that no talent trailer trash will be back doing what she was supposed to be doing but for her deal with the Devil that she signed as a Mousketress. I'm sorry, where was I, Britney Spears vacant figure head that is still somehow followed by millions of non-critical sycophants to what - oh right, the Pope. Yeah, I don't see a connection either - I don't want to offend anyone.

    Nonetheless, on this Peace day is going to urge more than a billion Catholics to ease up on the environmentalists. Let me be clear, the Pope is planning on suggesting that fears over man made emissions and all of the unprecident disasters were nothing more than scare mongering, and that even though some concerns may be valid it was absolutely, jesus christo, necessary that the international community base its policies on good hard science. Check out this quote, "Humanity today is rightly concerned about the ecological balance of tomorrow," he said in the message entitled "The Human Family, A Community of Peace". "It is important for assessments in this regard to be carried out prudently, in dialogue with experts and people of wisdom, uninhibited by ideological pressure to draw hasty conclusions, and above all with the aim of reaching agreement on a model of sustainable development capable of ensuring the well-being of all while respecting environmental balances."

     You got that right, the Prince of the Church, the man with the pointy hat, wants you and I to rely more on science more than, than, wait -what's that called - faith? You see, when its 60-degrees on Christmas day, when it feels like downtown Fiji in December in New Jersey, I don't need a MIT Professor to tell me that something is wrong with the environment. When I'm coughing out a lung in the middle of Summer, I don't need an environmentalist to tell me that, uhm, hey, maybe we shouldn't have cut down all of the trees. I mean come on, the environment is as screwy as Seth Green's career.

    What in the name of all things good, and Nemcoff, is going on here. Look, I'm not saying that I am 100% an environmentalist here. Of course not, I'm from Jersey. I drive on the Turnpike with the windows down and just suck them fumes in. Oh baby - its good stuff. But like I've told you before, I think the environmentalist movement needs to be market driven, and perhaps if you want to save the environment, the decision to save the environment is going to come from your own personal choices of what to purchase - i.e. don't be driving that SUV to Earth Day. The market is going to make the choices, and unfortunately, Mom and Pop in the middle of South Dakota are so into living with the super-sized convenience of now, that they aren't making purchases with their head, and are only thinking about the prize in their happy meal to give a crap about their kids. Its sad, but that's the market we're in.
     No, my problem here is not so much with Mom and Pop Fuddrucker, because they're going to reap what they sow - garbage in and garbage out, right. Unless your Coldplay, which is just garbage in and out. No my problem is with Pope Benny. Uhm...excuse me. Isn't your whole job based on, uhm, faith. If I needed scientists for everything, then what does that say about...uhm....bbrrrr.....religion? Dude, not to get all pedantic here, but come on.

     And when did the Pope start speaking out for big business. I mean shouldn't he be all "Save the Lord's creatures" ? But noooo, this guy is in the mode of "Don't worry about it...lets just keep researching things until we're 100% sure things are messed up. Hey, look, you're a good person - you'll go to Heaven, so what are you worrying about with this environmental nonsense" Please, don't make me sic those guys from Mythbusters on the Bible. They've been very nice up to now messing with shooting potatoes and blowing up toilets, but you know if they started getting involved with burning bushes and walking on water, there'd be some serious splainin to do.

    That being said Popey, ease off. Faith isn't something that religion has a monopoly on. I can see in the happiness and the laughter of my children, the beauty of nature, and in that the Knicks someday will be better in the future, that there is something out there greater than myself, hey that's just my belief, my faith if you will, and when its 40 degrees in Florida and 60 degrees in New Jersey in December, and my kids are wearing shorts on Winter Break, I have faith that something is just wrong with the environment.

    Because Pope, if we don't start relying upon faith a little bit and just stop taking the environment for granted there's going to come a point when you go to the woods to take a deuce, and there's not going to be any woods left for you - then what are you going to do.

    Did I just end this rant with a "does the Pope crap in the woods" reference?

    Its going to be a long year 2008 folks.

Wired on too little sleep, and too much rock n' roll - this is the JTS for December 2007. Featuring:

1. The Beautiful Girls
2. The Maine
3. Alice Smith
4. Joe Purdy
5. Tommy Strazza and the Model Citizens
6. Jim Testa
7. Aloud

Featuring Marimbas from Mother Africa

Download the show here

         I am not one to talk about my celebrity encounters. In fact, other than Adam Curry, I can't say that I've had that many. Of course, with Adam, it generally involves him making me shine his Headbangers Ball bedazzler jacket, and he promises me that if I get it right, he'll let me have his gold album that Saxon gave him in 1982, so I'm really working hard on it. Hey, its not like Kevin Seal ever offered me anything.

       I did have one celebrity encounter about two or three years ago that I've never shared with you. I was in the bathroom of New York City's Ruth's Chris Steakhouse during a a bachelor party. I was happily doing my thing at the urinal, and in walks in, none other than future first ballot Hall-of-Famer, Cy Young Winner, Roger Clemens, oh wait I wrote that last week - let me fix that one sec - and in walks in steroid abuser and cheater, Roger Clemens -  and he starts doing his business at the urinal next to me. Now, I clearly know who he is, and well, this was before the podcast, so he hadn't yet heard of me, and bbwe're just there both staring at the wall, trying not really acknowledge each other or have a Larry Craig moment. What do I care? I'm a Met fan, and lets face it, if I were to insert a joke at this point about pitchers and catchers, at this point, I believe you would think less of me as a human being, and it would cheapen the very soul of the podcast that you have come to love and respect. Uh huh huh - pitchers and catchers. 

    I'm sure it was only the matter of a minute, but when we finished it begged the question. I certainly didn't want to shake his hand. I'm not exactly going to have him autograph one of those brown paper towels that smell like my first-grade teacher, and on a guy-guy level, I've never been that big a fan of really going oh-my-gd crazy when I meet a male athlete, actor, or musician. Its just not cool. You know, fuggetabout, we're both guys, you just happen to make millions of dollars playing a child's game and I, well, help injured people recover their life, and compel major corporations to comply with the law. Did I mention that you get millions of dollars for playing a child's game. Not like I'm bitter or anything, and frankly the highlight of my atheletic career was when I was on the wrestling team and was part of one of the fastest matches in the history of the State of New Jersey. Unfortunately, I was on the receiving end. That was pretty much my wrestling career in a nutshell, but more about that some other time. Sending a celebrity a drink. Classy. Picking up your favorite athlete's check for dinner. Classy. Slobbering all over them like you were an 8th-grade girl and they were Justin Timberlake is just embarrassing.

     So, Roger and I kind of did that, "yo what's up" head nod to each other, and moved on with our lives. Of course, when I got back to the table I played it off with a very cool, "yeah, I just ran into Roger Clemens, and asked him if he wanted to join us for a drink. He said that he'd be over if Andy Petite didn't want to go get a double-machiato at the Starbucks. Oh you know that Andy and Roger, what maroons."

     That brings me to my subject of this weeks expose. The guy-guy code. As a New Jerseyian, I am a strong believer in it. There is just an unwritten law, a law, that is in fact greater than the actual statutory law, but a law written by men for men. Ladies, I'd love to say this isn't a sexist rant, but it is. There are just certain things, that I am never going to understand: the difference between Manolo's and jimmy chus; why women are voting for Hillary; why pregnancy monthly magazine comes in a 12-month subscription, and there are certain things that you simply are not going to understand about men. Tim Allen made a career about it. No, I'm not doing the monkey voice - do it yourself - I'll leave a little space for you.......man that just sounds silly.

     More importantly, the guy-guy code was never something taught to me, per Se, and maybe is just an expansion of the golden rule - the do on to others, or expect to get a whack on the back of the head, and everyone laughing.

      Just look at the news, the news is knee-deep in violations of the guy-guy code. I love this story: the great Evil Knievel recently passed away. In 1977, Evil was represented by Shelly Saltman. Saltman had helped him with the promotion for jumping Snake Canyon. Well, Saltman went on to write a tell-all book, which according to Evil, characterized him as an alcoholic and an anti-Semite. Evil Knievel, did what he thought was right, and went after Saltman with a baseball bat. A little fronteir justice. But, dude, seriously - do you really think that someone who would launch himself over twelve buses with nothing more than a helmet had a real good grasp on reality to begin with. I mean I loved Evil Knieval. I have a little scar on my hand from where one of the sparks from one of his toys burned me, but at a certain point, did he really need the helmet? I mean by the end of his career the guy had the physique of a boneless chicken.

     Please, I can honestly say that in the same position, that wouldn't have been my first impression of what to do, but to quote Chris Rock, I understand, and from Evil Knieval, I wouldn't have expected anything less.

     That being said, Saltman ended up with a badly broken arm and a judgment against Evil for 12.5 million dollars, which I must be honest about seems massively excessive in proportion to the injury. I mean think about it the "victim" in the Isaiah Thomas and the Knicks lawsuit only got $11 million, and I know you may be saying, "Hey, JT, what's a million dollars between us swinging guys." And to you, I think that the woman in the Isiah Thomas situation suffered far more than this Mr. Saltman, and while I think both of them deserved a gift-card to Best Buy and a ride on the "I contributed to my own injury" school bus, the fact of the matter is that while both Saltman and Isiah will never have the same of motion with their wrist (eh, you get where I'm going with that), Saltman's judgement in 1977 is so grossly out-of-proportion in 2007 dollars, that its just laughable. 

     Evil Knieval somehow was able to avoid paying on the judgement for over 30-years. Now Saltman is trying to get the money out of the estate, and frankly, in my opinion he should go fish. I mean on a guy-guy level, you just simply do not sell your friends out like that, and while Saltman continues to tell people that he was just trying to paint an accurate picture it remains, almost thirty-years later blatantly obvious that he sold Knievel out, and in the warped mind of a man that paid for the college funds of half of southern California's orthopedist's kids a broken arm, to him, is like a little smack on the butt....get out of here with that book you crazy kid. Of course, while the law entitles this Saltman guy to get paid - but how much is permanently damaged arm when this guy has so much disability already for having his head planted firmly up his butt. Boy, I would have hated to have been the Judge on that one.

    So, to Shelly Saltman. Let sleeping dogs lie. I'm not saying that you didn't have a case, and certainly what Evil Knievel did was criminally prosecutable and civilly compensable, but in the end, I think that the jury reached the wrong result. The purpose of the civil court is to make you whole, to compensate you for what you have lost and punish you from ever hurting anyone again. I don't think that any amount of money could get Mr. Saltman's Mr. Roboto arm back in slot-machine pulling shape. Money is never the answer. No, the answer would have been for Saltman to get a free shot at Evil Knievel - eh to a guy who's broken 40-bones, what's one more.  

     At the end of the day, Mr. Saltman didn't just have a brush with a celebrity, he developed a business relationship with someone in the public eye. He gained that individual's trust, and then spun it back for his own personal profit, and that's just not right on a guy-guy level or on any level, and anyone who uses their encounters with celebrities for their own gain deserves what they get.

      So, going back to Roger Clemens. He and I did share that guy-guy moment. We bonded in that short time together. All I can report to you is that, well, he certainly does pitch righty, and as far as a "Rocket"  - not so-much - more like one of those little nano-tech missle thingies.

     Crap. Roger Clemens is going to break my arm.

I can't believe that I missed the obvious joke:

From KChrisH on Twitter:

"@jerseytodd: every time an RIAA exec gets beheaded, an angel gets its wings :P (ref: show 103)"

 

Brian Setzer and his Orchestra have joined the Revolution.

Download the news flash here.

The Return of the Hardest Working Lawyer in Podcasting brings with him:

1. The Surefire Way
2. John Taglieri
3. Joe Colledge
4. John Hoskinson

Thanks to Jimmy Lee with Dead Hot Blonde and Bittersweet.

Download the show here

 

 

I love my State. I really do. From Aberdeen to Zarapeth, New Jersey is my home. I grew up here, fell in love here, had children here, and have even defended my homeland in Court. I cringe everytime I hear a Jersey joke. I've got Jersey on the brain to the point that when I hear people call Adam Curry, "AC", I think that they're talking about Atlantic City.

 

            But that's not my point, my point is that it drives me so nuts, when we Joisey-ites give the world another chance to lick their finger and stick it in our collective ears. This of course never happened to me personally, but I did get hung on a hook for a little bit by my belt – short guy with a big mouth, what should have I expected when I told the captain of the football team that if he spent more time examining his playbook as opposed to his tater-tots, we'd be in a lot better shape for the Homecoming game. What did I know, some guys take it as constructive criticism, and other people hang fans on a hook?  

 

            Take for example our newest claim to shame, the current Miss New Jersey, Amy Polumbo. I don't know if you caught this story, but it's a good one. Apparently, Miss Polumbo received two packages and letters threatening to reveal racy photos of her if she didn't drop out of the Miss America contest. Bizarre. Here's where it gets even weirder, she revealed the pictures today, and frankly, they aren't that bad. Sure, there is one picture of her boyfriend posing with her provocatively, and sure, there is another one of her in a pose more spread eagled than Mary Lou Retton, and sure, there's a few of her drinking alcohol, and the kicker is that in all of the pictures, she's wearing clothes, she's not doing anything illegal, and just looks like a girl having fun. I mean she looks like a goofy friend of your sister's and hey do you want me to try to get you a date with her, but they aren't even in the same stratosphere as pages 52 through 57 of the September 1984 of Penthouse, featuring former Miss America winner Vanessa Williams. I'm not conceding publicly that I have that issue, but I will say, "boy, the prices on those protective baggies for Penthouse magazines really have gone up since 1984, you know what I mean, wink wink, nudge nudge."

 

            To quote the original gangster himself, Mr. William "Willy Will" Shakespeare, "a pox on all of your houses." I swear on the sideburns of Paulie Walnuts, I have no idea who I dislike more in this story.

 

            Lets start at the one who, in theory, is committing a criminal act, the unidentified blackmailer. This person wants Miss New Jersey to drop out of the Miss America contest. No money. No other benefit, just wants her to drop out of the pageant. Ok, this is bizarre. So, who can we eliminate – well, the mob for one – 'cause heck, they're running the pageant so they don't have any interest. The other 49 competitors? They were afraid of her? Please, unless the talent competition involves a hair scrunchee and a trip to the mall, I think that Ms. California or Ms. Florida or Ms. Arizona, or Miss Anywhere-they-have-decent-weather-for-most-of-the-year, had a horse-racers chance of beating her. So, if I were still working at the Attorney General's office, I'd be very antsy to talk to the person that lost the Miss New Jersey competition, because maybe they're the only one with any real interest here. Oy, the "runner-up in the 2007 Miss New Jersey" pageant – that's less job security than Gary Cherone's stint in Halen. But, frankly, this is an evil genius who is just not striving to reach their full potential. Hmm…lets risk going to jail for a long time that you could just accomplish by saying "Blackmailer says! Blackmailer says!" Oof, that joke fell flatter than the last pancake that got stuck underneath Dom DeLuise’s third chin.

            Now lets talk about the current Miss New Jersey, Ms. Polumbo. What the heck were you thinking? From what I read, the photos that you were being blackmailed with were from your Facebook site. You've got to be kidding me. Now I hate to be stereotypical here, but how could you be so, so, blonde? Don't you know that pretty much that every thing you put on the net, from who is the best lawyer in New Jersey to, to, well wait, let the google search hit that again, who is the best lawyer in New Jersey to   oh I dunno, Paris Hilton is a clown, is going to show up on the net. Now, I have seen the pictures. They are not sexual at all, in fact, they are some what goofy, in a "Legally Blonde" kind of way. But don't try to kid me that you only meant them for friends and were on a private site on Facebook. Please. Both you and I know, that our friends on Facebook and Myspace and all of these social networking type sites are as loyal as guy in a dark van offering to give a ten year old some ice cream . Please. There are more predators on that site than there were in all of the Jurassic Park movies. You knew exactly what you were posting, where you were posting them, and how they would be taken, and you know what, if I ran across them I wouldn't have even thought twice about them. But please don't insult my intelligence by saying these were some sort of super secret website. Frankly, if you were my friend on myspace, I would have really been more supportive - because winter, spring, summer, or fall, Miss New Jersey, all you had to do is call, because you've got a friend on myspace, Miss New Jersey.

 

            Let's go to the last leg of this triad of stupidity, the pageant itself. Isn't it time that we took a look at these things. Now, I'm not suggesting that we need to change anything in these pageants, but aren't they a little dated and just a whole lot sexist? Don't get me wrong, I'm all for consentual sexist behavior, if that's what's agreed upon by the parties, but don't try to tell me that these 50 girls in bikinis are there just to show the beauty of the female form. Of course not, they are in butts in the seats, and not necessarily female butts (give or take a few really butch looking truckers). So, I don't see why that the pageant directors would have any problems with racy pictures, unless they're upset that they didn't get their cut of the proceeds, But, please, the concept that all of these women in this pageant are all little angels and carriers of the moral torch is so darn Betty Crocker 1950's that it makes my head spin. In fact, I want my Miss New Jersey to have a drink every once in awhile and to have fun with her friends. That's who we are in New Jersey. The concept that a Miss America should be a bimbo that can twirl a baton and wish for world peace is as antiquated as my TRS-80 Color Computer. Ok, that was perhaps the geekiest reference I've ever made, but hey, you have to know you're audience, right?

 

This being said, I actually feel sorry for Miss Garden Patch because for a girl who shows her Jersey tomatoes in a bikini in front of millions of people in a pageant, to even give a care the size of the back of a thong is just not fair. But hey, this is what she wanted right? She wanted the adulation, the attention, and oh yeah, to have a crown on her head, and in some respects this alleged blackmail has brought you more attention than you really ever deserved. One could…even…think…that…she…staged…the whole thing…..Ah, forget it, she's a blonde. You know, if you really wanted to impress me Miss Palumbo, rather than really caring about stupid beauty pageants, why not do something that really would change the world – like becoming a teacher.

 

So, I'm considering putting out a new show, as a companion to the Jersey Toddshow, called "Jersey Todd's Briefs". Check out the softest of soft launches, here and email me if you want to help.

After a little break, we're back with a great show. Including

1. Jim Armstrong
2. Glenn Mercer
3. The Hedrons
4. Eytan Mirsky
5. Joe Colledge
6. Jason Harrod

With opening music by Lez Zepplin

Promo from Indie Radio Chattanooga

Listen to the show or download it HERE

        The law is a funny thing. It exists for various reasons. One is to codify the collective morality of people, in saying hey that's messed up, or hey that behavior is something that we don't want to have. It exists to protect people from behavior that we find abhorrent. The criminal justice system exists to punish who deviate from those accepted norms. But, every once in awhile, the punishment just doesn't fit the crime.

        Take for example the case of Genarlow Wilson. In 2003, he was 17-years old. He went to a New Years Eve Party just outside of Atlanta. He met a girl, who was 15-years old. They engaged in consentual oral sex. As opposed to the type that Hugh Grant engages in, which involves Visa Reward Points. But under the peachy laws of the State of Georgia, Wilson was convicted of aggravated child molestation, and under the terms of that conviction was sentenced to a mandatory jail term of 10-years. He's already been in jail for two years. Think about it, he thought that night in 2003 that he was getting lucky, which was anything from the truth.

       In fact, as a result of the attention that Wilson's case has gotten, including appeals by former President Carter, the Georgia legislator changed the law regarding consentual sex with a minor from a felony to a misdemeanor. Other misdemeanors in the State of Georgia include drinking alcohol from an open container, or driving without your seatbelt. In fact, according to a site I found called jamesfuqua.com, in Georgia, it is illegal to say "Oh, Boy" in Jonesboro, Georgia. Atlanta makes it against the law to tie a giraffe to a telephone pole or street lamp. My favorite, that in Pocataligo, GA, it is a It is a violation for a woman over 200 pounds and attired in shorts to pilot or ride in an airplane. However, because the law was put into effect after Wilson went to jail, he's still sitting in a Georgia prison.

        On Monday of this past week, a Superior Court Judge threw out the conviction on 8th Amendment grounds indicating that this was "Cruel and Unusual" punishment, and indicated that Wilson should get out with time served. However, the Attorney General, a white guy, named Thubert Baker filed an appeal claiming that the Superior Court Judge had no authority and that there were serious legal issues that needed to be cleared up first. But Wilson sits in jail. In fact, he's not even been allowed to post bond pending the appeal. Wilson has an extremely committed attorney, with an unfortunate name, B.J. Bernstein, and they have already been to the Georgia Supreme Court once, and I'd bet a dollar that they're going to have to go again. I even think there may be a lot of grounds to file a writ of habeaus corpus in the Federal Court. Nothing for nothing, I spent two years defending those things from N.J. inmates, and if ever one should be considered by the Federal Court, its Wilson's.

       What burns me up, is that I don't really understand the rationale of the Prosecutors and Attorney General Baker. By all accounts, Wilson was a good kid, he was college bound, and not some sort of thug. Ok, fine, he was a 17-year old kid who got head from a minor, and I agree that we have to draw the line somewhere. But to put him in jail for a mandatory minimum sentence for ten years, when the people of Georgia have already changed the law is a complete abuse of power. It begs the question, what would have happened if a white kid were in the same situation? While mandatory minimum sentences sound great during election years, it is situations like this that show that every case has to be treated on its own merit, and the punishment has to fit the crime, and certainly any Judge would have been more qualified than a legislator to sentence Wilson appropriately. Compare and contrast this case with that of Chuck Bodine. Not to confuse you with NASCAR driver Todd Bodine. Crikey, did I just make a NASCAR reference, what the hell is going on with me lately. But anyway, Chuck Bodine, was a repairman for American Appliances in Denver. In June 2005, he stepped out of a truck and fell into a heap. He previously had an artificial hip, and somehow getting out of the truck had caused it to shift. He got medical treatment, which included a new hip, but his employer contested him getting workers compensation benefits because the company's lawyer cited an 81-year old precident called the "wooden leg" doctrine. Under this theory, workers' comp. benefits aren't provided to wooden legs because workers' comp. is for personal injuries and not personal property. Bodine lost his house, he moved in with his parents, his private medical insurance hounded him for repayment, all because of a really dumb argument put forth by his company's defense attorney. As Bodine told the Court, the hip isn't exactly something I can pop in and out. After two years of limping around with this case, the Colorado Court of Appeals finally came through, and allowed Bodine to collect his benefits.

      I'm in Court every day. This is all I do. I'm an absolute geek for this stuff, and the weeks that you don't get a podcast are the weeks that I am knee deep in the slop of the legal world. I see bad arguments all the time. In fact, I'm a big believer in "if it ain't your case, shut your face" and there are days that I almost get TMJ from clenching my face so tight from getting involved in someone else's mess. The lesson that I learn from these cases is that too often lawyers work in the abstract, and occasionally completely lose their grip on reality. Sure, the prosecutors in Georgia have a very nice legal argument. Sure, the defense attorney in Colorado is tickled pink to have found a use for an 81-year old precident, and sure, I'd love to get every dollar imaginable for my clients that are injured at work, and it gets really difficult to see the forest for the trees. But, at the end of the day, attorneys and Judges have to realize that even though law school desensitizes you, we still are dealing with real people, and this includes delivery men that an insurance company wants to say that has a wooden hip, and a teenager who unfortunately got wood, and when attorneys and Judge's start engaging in academic self stimulation, situations arise that give rise to a billion lawyer jokes, and a complete lack of confidence in the legal system as a whole.

      I'm happy for Bodine that he got his comp. benefits. It was the right decision. But, if you're listening to my show in Georgia, I think its time that the winds of change begin to be blown. I think that the decision by the Attorney General absolutely sucks. I think two years in jail for Genarlow Wilson is far more than sufficient, and actually exceeds what type of punishment should be given for a consentual act. Because, at the end of the day, the only head that matters in Georgia rests squarely on the shoulders of its jurists and attorneys, and its about time that one of them started to use it.    

Jersey Todd is a happy camper, cause I got two shows out in a week. See what happens when I have a little bit of free time.....What a show we have for you today, including the dulcet sounds of:

1. PRYDE
2. Jeff Mallon
3. John Anno
4. The Winter Sounds
5. Patricia Paay
6. Caren Kennedy

Featuring Psykosoul and a promo from the Modern Music Business Podcast

Download the show here

and don't forget to get your domain names at GoDaddy.com and get some Tylenol PM

      I am a big reader, and I have been ever since I was a little kid. I think I went right from See Jack Run, to see Spider-man thwack Doc Ock. I've talked about it on the show, but I remember being in Mrs. Buffett's kindergarten glass in Asher Holmes Elementary School in idyllic Marlboro, New Jersey, trying to explain to her that I read 'omnipotent' in a comic book. Frankly, a billion years later, I don't even think she knew what 'omnipotent' meant. Take your E-I-E-I-O and shove it, lady.

       It was high school when I first read "Catcher in the Rye" by JD Salinger. JD Salinger, not JD from Scrubs, and certainly not the JD that I got from good ol' Route 202 U in Delaware. But anyway, I love this book. It is male teenage angst personified. It absolutely, perfectly captures and bottles that AJ Soprano moment in your life when you realize that a lot of the things that you looked up to and respected, really turned out to just be a crock of crap. If you never read it, the main character, Holden Caufield basically is standing on the precipice of adulthood, and characterizes so many adults, and especially those who are seeking materialistic things as "phonies."

       I felt for Holden Caufield. I really did, and I related to him, not in a Mark David Chapman kind of way, but I really did, and I think I always will. To that extent, I think that every once in awhile, even though I am supposedly an adult, I still have my Holden Caufield moments. This is especially true when I see an icon of my youth turn out to be a complete phony.

       The first movie I ever owned on video tape was Rocky. The movie that I watched while taking a break from studying was Rocky. Heck, there were a couple of days in law school, where studying took a back seat to a Rocky marathon. Come to think of it, I used to run to the soundtrack to Rocky III all the time. I really related to it on two levels, first the obvious story of the Rocky Balboa � the southpaw from South Philly who goes from punching meat to becoming the champion of the world. This is the quintessential underdog story. But, I also related to it on the adult level as well. Sylvester Stallone was a struggling artist, and out of nowhere, and a minimal budget, came out of nowhere to win 3-Oscars. Sylvester Stallone was inspirational to me. He also now appears to be a completely vain, dishonest, phony.

       I've already told you my distaste for Mr. Stallone's pushing the last Rocky Movie toward the religious right. They had websites and everything explaining how Rocky could be used in secular curriculum and really it pushed me away as a fan. I told you about how I wasn't going to see Rocky 22.5, or whatever they had out, and I still haven't seen the movie. But that was a few months ago, and I thought that was it. In fact, in the history of the JTS, there has not been anyone that has deserved two essays for the similar offenses, but as Mr. T said: Sly, "I'm gonna bust you up."

       This past week, Sly was charged charged with illegally importing performance and image enhancing drugs in a Sydney courtroom, according to the Sydney Morning Herald. According to Australian authorities, the 60-year-old action star, who did not appear in court, was caught at Sydney Airport with several vials of a steroid known as hGH (human growth hormone), during a random baggage check. Customs officials claim they found a total of 48 vials of the steroid after they raided Stallone's Sydney hotel room, limousine and private jet. Stallone will be required to enter a plea on April 24. If found guilty, he faces a maximum fine of $22,000 Austrailian.

       According to steroid.com, "Bodybuilders may illicitly self-administer hGH to improve size and strength, usually by subcutaneous injection into the lower abdomen." HGH has also "become a popular but expensive medication prescribed in anti-aging therapies."

       That's right kids, that patented Rocky comeback ability � that was nothing more than roid rage, and the chisled look didn't come from running up the steps of the Art Museum, it came from performance enhancing steroids.  For some reason, I can accept that Barry Bonds and major league atheletes use steroids, but Rocky on roids just really burns me up, on so many levels. 

      At the most basic, here is a guy that portrays the image of hard work. I've gone to the gym for years (well, not recently, but I've got scuses. Send me a nano, and I'll think about it). Now Rocky was the guy that told you that at the very basic, you didn't need a fancy gym membership to get in shape, you could go out in the alleyway and chase a chicken. Speed, speed is what we need. How many times have I run up the stairs of a building and got to the top and put my hands in the air and waved it around like I just accomplished something. Actually, now that I'm turning into an old man during allergy season, running up the stairs, that is a big deal, but I digress.     

        You see, today, Rocky isn't in the back alley, chasing a chicken � nope, he's in that alley peddling roids, and that just makes me sad.  But this bothers me on the personal level, too. You know, because of the relationship Sly and I have had for the last twenty years. Lets be honest, he's made some bad, bad movies, but you know he's also made some pretty darn good ones too. The best one that he's made in 20-years, Copland. Yeah, it's a bit long in parts, and a little bloated in the amount of "stars" involved, but what I loved about Sly in this movie is that he was willing to put on about 100-pounds to play the role of a small town New Jersey cop. I thought he did a great job, and while his performance was certainly not Oscar worthy, it really made me feel that this guy took his craft a little bit more seriously than he did in "Demolition Man".

       But, I guess not. I'm not sixty-years old, and I certainly have a face made for podcasting, but I can't imagine being that vain. I can't imagine the need to break the law, I can't imagine the need to sacrifice my health and future just to look like a body builder. I mean seriously, this isn't some second string defensive end from Texas trying to make Varsity, this is a guy who has all the money in the world, and is taking steroids for maintenance? Give me a break. 

       Now I don't begrudge aging celebrities from getting some work done in an effort to save their "spot." However, botox, facelifts, and boob jobs � well, they're all legal, just ask Goldie Hawn. Jeez, she�s had more work on her than HUD housing. My god Goldie Hawn has had so much work on her that ever time she leaves her house that Ty guy from Extreme Makeover starts yelling, bus driver move that bus! But when you start importing illegal roids into another country you've pushed vanity up the list of the several deadly sins.

       Speaking of movies, here's one that I can't see Stallone doing a remake of � Midnight Express Yeah, he brought 48 vials�.48 vials of steroids. I mean this guy had to know that this was illegal, he had to know that what he was doing was wrong, and you have to think that he knows that dropping 22K to get out of going to jail is the best friggin' money he could have spent. If it were Rocky's world, and not Sly's world, well Rock would be singing Dancing Matilda until after Barack's second term at the very least (see how I snuck that in there).

        In thinking about my man Holden Caufield, its almost like he so badly wanted to maintain his childlike innocence. He wanted so bad to see the world as he wanted it to be, rather than the world that its is. He put on blinders to the world, and he knowingly made choices that ultimately kept him from living a full life. Slyvester Stallone � he's made choices too, and he's sacrificing his health and potentially his freedom for just one more round of fame and power. If that's not a "phony", I don't know who is.

      This is just another thing, another shot to the head, just another shot to the body, and while its not the knock-out punch that would put Stallone out of our consciousness entirely, its clear he's losing on points. Sly has to know that fighting Father Time and Mother Nature is the one fight that he'll never win, and in regard to this fight, maybe Rocky needs to do the one thing he should have done Appollo Creed, because instead of loading up on roids, its time that Rocky throws in the towel.

Well, you knew I had to get my two cents in this subject. Is two cents offensive? I have no idea any more. We also feature the great music of

1. Mike Harwood
2. Chris Ayer
3. Arthur Yoria
4. The Rosinators
5. Dylan in the Movies
6. Katie Ellen

Also, a little help from 37hz

Go over to Go Daddy and get some Tylenol PM

Download the show HERE

 

       Kurt Vonnegut passed away this week. I have been a Vonnegut fan for a really long time. Breakfast of Champions, Slaughterhouse Five and Cats Cradle are probably three of my all time favorite books. So, you can't imagine how excited I was when I graduated from Syracuse University they told us that Mr. Vonnegut was going to be our commencement speaker. I couldn't have asked for a graduation present. On that day, Mr. Vonnegut taught us a lot of things, but something that he said will always stick with me for the rest of my life, he said that too often in our busy world, we miss the good things, we miss out on seeing things for what they are, we miss out on sunsets too often, and every once in awhile, we should just stop, take a breath, and say, "hey, isn't this nice?"

       Mr. Vonnegut passed away this week, and in thinking about his legacy, and one of the main things that I think about is his battle against censorship, of any kind. Slaughterhouse five is an enigma, it is at once one of the most banned books in this country, and yet is one of the books that many teachers consider required reading.

       I wonder what Mr. Vonnegut would think of Mr. Imus' situation. They both had a lot of similarities. They both are some craggly, old, pains in the butt. But they both love words. Unless you've been living under a rock, you know the whole story, I can't recall a more overanalyzed deal - but for the benefit of our foreign listeners, let me just run through it one time. Don Imus is a legendary radio personality. I used to listen to him on my little AM clock radio getting ready for school in like elementary school. I was a weird first grader, sue me. He always pushed the envelope of what you could get away with on the radio. I remember him going, 'hey baby, let me show you my donkey kong' and "hey baby, let me see your fuzzy peaches." I mean this was before Howard, before Opie and Anthony, and before Mark Yoshimoto Nemcoff. Yeah, I said it - he's on their level if not more so.        

          So this past week, he called the Rutgers Basketball team, in an attempt to be funny a bunch of "nappy headed ho's". Now I don't find this all too funny. I mean in the context of what he was saying in the comedic context, it was as funny as making a joke about Corey Lidle's piloting skills. See, it just doesn't work.

          However, just as I respect the right of Mr. Imus to say whatever he wants, I also respect the right of others to say that this was offensive. Though I question the degree of some of the outrage - Tony Dungy, coach of the Colts, said "this incident has caused more pain to us than any other racially insensitive incident in our industry that I can remember."

         Now Coach Dungy could be the subject of an entirely different essay, but the hyperbole from Reverends Sharpton and Jackson and even Barack Obama is the equivalent of using a bazooka to swat a fly. This is the most insensitive thing he can remember. Did he forget that this week was also the 60th anniversary of Jackie Robertson entering the major leagues? What kind of insensitivities did Jackie have to deal with? Those who don't follow history are doomed to repeat it.

            However, this past week, the world exploded under Imus' feet. He was fired from MSNBC, and fired from his job on CBS, and has in some respects been labeled being more of a pariah than the kid wearing the ponchas pilate t-shirt at bible camp. He's apologized to the team, he's apologized to the fans, he's apologized to Coach Vivian Stringer.             In an effort to fully disclose all of my bona fides in this discussion, I actually was the attorney that represented the people that sold Coach Stringer her house when she moved to New Jersey to take the job to become women's basketball coach. She and I spent a good two or three hours doing the closing together, and chatting about college basketball. I was in awe. She was an incredibly cool woman, and I could totally see why her players would break down walls for her. Of course, my clients were annoyed that I spent the whole time talking to her, but hey they were moving out of State - it wasn't like they were gonna send me any more work. However, Coach Stringer, on behalf of her players, is really the best spokesman and the only real person with standing to express their feelings. Reverend Al? Come on - the man behind Tawana Brawley? The man who refused to apologize to Stephen Bagonis after being found liable for defaming him? Reverend Jackson? I'm still waiting for my apology about hymie town.            

      I don't really know if nappy headed hos is offensive. I know what its like to be offended. I know that I got cross eyed stares when I went to school in Delaware and one of the sandwich shops had a "Jewish sandwich" To which, I asked whether it was made with real Jews. Maybe I'll never know as a white guy why that phrase is the nuclear bomb that it has been perceived to me. It's not a phrase that I ever use or would use. I just don't think a white guy calling a woman a "ho" in any context is that funny. When I write for Pacific Coast Hellway, it allows me to reach into that dark evil mean context of my soul and spew it all out there. Yeah, I'm not telling you which shows I contributed to, but the point is there is a dark humor side in me that shocks me but you know, I've never really used the word because it doesn't have any comedic value; its not shocking, its not controversial, it has no pizzaz  - its just very lame sounding. Its not creative. Calling a female podcaster who's show I don't really care for "Golem", well that's got style.  Nappy? I dunno. I mean it's just weak. Making fun of someone's hair? Giving Imus the benefit of the doubt, and considering the context of a comedy radio program, it was just a bad joke. I am shocked, shocked that nobody noticed this: the Rutgers' Women's Basketball Team are nicknamed the Scarlet Knights. Think about this for a second. For all of their feminist wiles, for all of their aversion to being called "ho's", they'd prefer to be manly men in tin cans. Yes, for all of the yelling and screaming about being demeaned as women, they were already being demeaned by the State University of New Jersey, who forced them to play under the moniker of masculinity. They aren't the oxymoronic Lady Knights. But in the context of the game of basketball, it didn't matter. The term "Knight" is just a word, and while "ho" is just a word, too. Its all about the context of where the words are spoke. Hey, my school's Women's basketball team was 9-20 and was called the Orange. Don't ask me to figure out why Central New York supports citrus so much. It must be the weather. Imus has said some offensive things over the years. Some things that are racist, some things that as a jewish guy, have offended me as anti-semetic. However, I also know that he's not an anti-semite or a racist; at least I don't think so. You know what I do when Imus pissed me off? I punished him. I turned him off. I understand that words hurt. It's what I do for a living. I understand. Trust me; I dropped some poor word choices over the years, too. Like the time that I went into Court and said to a defense attorney, "look what your carrier did to my client! Look what this injury did to him. He's a cripple!" Yeah, apparently, calling your own client a "cripple" really pushes the Defcom 5 button. But words heal, as well. The same mouth that uttered nappy headed hos also uttered the words that raised millions of dollars for kids of all different races and shame on MSNBC for not simulcasting his telethon. I guess preventing additional racist comments is more important than helping kids with cancer. It's all about priorities. Should Imus have been fired?

       Certainly what he said is not illegal, complies with current FCC guidelines, and is protected 1 st Amendement speech. No, Imus was fired for business reasons. His employers were threatened by advertisers who were threatened by special interest groups. Follow the money. I can't say that I would buy a product if it was being shilled by an anti-semetic host, and I can see why an employer would fire a racist host just because its bad business. The problem is that, Don Imus isn't a racist, he isn't an anti-Semite. He's a crotchety old man that forgot that not everything out of his mouth is funny to everyone. I certainly can't believe that GM would sell less cars because they advertise on a radio program. GM sells less cars because they don't make great cars.     

      The other day, New Jersey Governor John Corzine was on the way to arbitrate an apology between Imus and the Rutgers team. Again, do I think we need the Governor of the State of New Jersey to get involved with this pressing issue of State business? Of course not. Why not appoint some Judges and lower property taxes instead? While on the way to the meeting, Governor Corzine's SUV was in an accident and was crushed against a guardrail. He suffered a bad break of his leg where the bone popped out, a fractured collarbone, 6 broken ribs and fractured vertebrae. He's going to need at least three surgeries. The lesson that he taught the Scarlet Knights that day was pretty simple. Sticks and stones may break your bones, but crashing into a guardrail without a seatbelt that's going to leave a mark.

         In the end, I think people need to be accountable for their words. I think you have to examine the context of things. I think you have to look at a person's intent. I think the only response to bad words is more words and louder words. I think that if someone apologizes, you have to accept it. I think that a lot of people rushed to judgment regarding the Imus situation. I think if the title of a racist doesn't fit, you must acquit. I think that when you hear something that you think offends you, you have to take a deep breath, really think about the source, and maybe before you talk of marches and firing people; take ol' Vonnegut's advice and look at a sunset and say "isn't this nice?"

Grab your tux or your evening gown, because its time for the Best of 2006 on the Jersey Toddshow. With:

1. Geoff Smith presented by Brian
2. The Alice Project presented by Marta and Ken
3. Black Lab presented by CC Chapman
4. Tris McCall
5. Rick Barry presented by Mark Yoshimoto Nemcoff
6. Brown Bag Lunch presented by Brian Noe

Featuring Bucket, Mad-Town Aces, Neil Bearse, and Michael Yusi

To get the show, click here

The Toddies aren't tonight, because I've got something absolutely amazing to play for you -

1. Courtesy of Surfdog Records, the great Brian Setzer
2. Courtesy of the Podsafe Music Network, the amazing John Taglieri
3. Courtesy of the Chosen People, the LeeVees
4. Courtesy of West Virgina, Hydrogyn
5. Courtesy of Good Grammar, Shake Some Action!
6. Courtesy of Mr. and Mrs. Leshem, Omer Leshem

 

With promos from the Friday Night Dance Party and Audio Attitude. 

Download the show directly, by clicking here

The President of the Islamic Republic of Iran wrote an open letter to the citizens of the United States this week. I think its only good manners that I write him back. Featuring music by:

1. This Love Machine
2. Jonathan Coulton
3. Perfuma
4. Japhy Ryder
5. Marc Erelli
6. Tracey Grammer (Wow!)

Featuring: The Reel Banditos, and the Slauson Podshow kids!

Promos by: The 100 Word Podcast and Number One with a Bullet

Download the show directly by hitting this link

 

No idea why this came to mind. Could it be all of the turkey in the refrigerator? Well, these artists are no turkeys:

1. Agency
2. Blue Number Nine
3. Michelle Hotaling
4. Geoff Smith
5. Scotty Meyer Band
6. Karmyn Tyler

With opening music by the Family Groove Company

Click here to download the show directly.

You had to know when I told you that I was going away for a vacation, that I would have something to bitch about when I got back? Right?

But, I did come home to some great music, including:

1. Mike Previti
2. Montoya
3. Paisley Riot
4. The National Pool
5. Noctaluca
6. Noen

Also, a little Guardian Mind Mix

Download the show directly here

About to go on a mini-vacation to Arizona, but I wanted to get a show out to you. Apparently, when I drink too much coffee and diet coke, I want to play some rocking music, including:

1. Crazy Babies
2. Rasa 9
3. Babylon Bombs
4. Zamarro
5. Sutra

Click Here to directly download the show 

If its Sunday, its the Jersey Toddshow. Yet another amazing show that you need to hear. This was the audio essay where I had to ask myself, is this one the one that is too offensive? You be the judge, and listen to some great music, including:

1. The Wylde Bunch
2. Dan Anibal
3. Allison Crowe
4. Patrick Hall
5. Michael Brett

Also, come listen to a very flustered Jersey Toddshow hyping the Light on Light Through Podcast, and our old friend Brian from Audio Attitude.

Click here to directly download the show.

I don't really care who you vote for, as long as you go out and vote. This is an extremely important election, and its time for your voice to be heard loudly, one way or another. While you're waiting on line, you can hear some great music, including:

1. Ricki Lee Jones
2. Bill Vivino Band
3. Jode Bonney
4. Steve Paroe
5. P.J. Pacifico
6. American Heartbreak
7. Colie Brice

Click here to directly download the show

On this show, I felt like I kept saying, "I really dig this song!" Maybe it is because I truly did. All of the music on tonight's episode really worked for me, and is it wrong for me to think that the rant was especially good? Judge for yourself, as we feature:

1. The Shakes featuring Lady A
2. Maybe Pete
3. Orange is in
4. Kelly Brock
5. Jeremy Mix
6. Uncle Floyd

Click here to download the show directly

Sometimes, the show just writes itself, and today, was no exception. Everything just came together and fit just right. On the show we feature:

1. The Genders
2. Shearer
3. Anthony Fiumano
4. Flocab
5. Brett Mikels
6. Moshav Band
   Buy at iTunes Music Store

Opening music by Joshua Dranoel

Download the show here

It is very rare that I get angry. It is very rare that I make an argument that's personal. Today, on the Jersey Toddshow I am angry, and it is personal, indeed. Censorship, in any form, is wrong and you need to tune in to check out what happened to Rick Barry. In other news, I played some great stuff from:

1. The Wylde Bunch
   
2. Rick Barry
3. The Fire Apes
4. The Idea
5. The Eisenhowers
6. Jamie Cullum (really!)
Buy at iTunes Music Store

Intro music from: Savium

Click here to directly download the show.

I have defended a lot of different types of people, criminals and prison officials; injured workers and their employers, but today, I take on representation of my most difficult client yet, George W. Bush. Tune in and see what I come up with. By the end, I even may have convinced myself.

1. Pat Zelenka
2. John Hughes - and the site for Neil Young's "Living With War"
3. Electron Love Theory

4. David Berkeley

• Buy at iTunes Music Store
• Buy at Napster
• Buy at RealNetworks / Rhapsody
• Buy at GroupieTunes


5. Deathray Davies - courtesy of Glurp Records
• Buy at iTunes Music Store
• Buy at RealNetworks / Rhapsody
• Buy at GroupieTunes


6. Dan Anibal
7. John Romano

Of course, we have a big update regarding the kids from Selested, and some amazing personal news that you simply have to stay tuned for.

Click here to download the show directly.

For the rest of my life, this time of year always makes me think of 9/11/2001. I can't believe how much my life has changed and the world has changed sinc ethat time. But this isn't a 9/11 show, per se, but a reminder that you should do things that make you happy - like playing hearing great podsafe music, including:

1. dAVID jANES
2. Phil Ayoub
3. Willie Niles


Buy at iTunes Music Store



4. Crazy Babies
5. George Hrab
6. John Romano

Opening music from the very dangerous, the enigmatic - The Reel Banditos

 

Click here to download the show directly

Evil? Me? Couldn't be! Well, actually tonight I let out the first hints of my evil plan to take over the world. The first hint, it will start in Colorado. That's really as far as the plan goes, but its nice to have the beginning done with. On the show, I excitedly played:

1. Stephen Coonan
2. Alyssa Hendrix
3. Sutra
4. The Comfies
5. Devon Allman's Honeytribe
6. Joel Lightman Band
7. Vanessa Peters and Ice Cream on Mondays
8. Denise Vasquez

 Click here to download the show directly

I've gone and done it now. I've gone and kicked the bear, but someone needed to. Who is the target of this week's show? You'll have to find out. Music by:

1. Blake Morgan, with some guy named Lenny Kravitz
2. Rasa 9
3. New London Fire
4. Bill DeRome
5. The Lights
6. Omer Leshem

click click here

Joe Lieberman is thinking about running as an independent? You've got to be kidding me. On the show, we've got great music from:

1. George Thorogood
2. Tubby
3. The Gentlemen
4. Karmella's Game
5. Evongale
6. St. Christopher

Click here

Mel Gibson. Mel Gibson. Mel Gibson. What are we gonna do with you? All I know, is that we're gonna play some great podsafe music and have a good time on a Summer night. On this show, I played

1. Finniston
2. David Ippolito
3. Small Town Sleeper
4. Tris McCall
5. Kevin Reeves
6. Mark Mallman
7. Sarah Aubrey and the Audio Visual Club

Click here

The first show for Podshow and Sirius. Hope it isn't too much of a trainwreck. I do know that the music absolutely rocks. On the show, you'll hear:

1. The Lordz
2. New London Fire
3. Rasa 9
4. Lions in the Street
5. Gasoline
6. Rick Barry

Special Thanks to Nick Murray, Boris Khaykin, Michael Yusi and the uncanny Brian Noe.

Click here

Apparently, we're way past World War III. So, if its the end of the world, its time to rock.

On this show, you'll hear

1. Zamarro
2. Anti-Hero
3. Anonymous American
4. Boris Khaykin
5. Naama Hillman

Intro music by Dreamline

 Get it here

And here's your Essay:

    Summertime is all about sequels. X-Men Three, Clerks II, Die Hard 4, I mean if the Entertainment section of the newspaper keeps covering sequels, then why shouldn't the Front page cover sequels as well?
 
    Last weekend, one of my close personal friends and most enlightened individual on the planet, Newt Gingrich - oh wait - [noise like hitting the back of one's own head], ah that feels better, every once in awhile you have to get the old noggin' back in line, now where was I? Oh yes, last weekend, one of the biggest retards on the planet and complete two faced bastard, Newt Gingrich was on the venerable Meet the Press, where he told Woodsy the Owl himself, Tim Russert, that the situation in Israel and Lebanon was the beginning of World War III. Now notwithstanding that Tim Russert has a face that looks like he's about to ask how many licks does it take to get to the center of a Tootsie Roll pop, even he looked shocked that good ol Newt took the old rhetoric meter up to a new level. I mean Newt didn't just pick the hammer up and ring the bell, he goddamn might as well have popped the bell off.
    
    But then again, once you get past the pasty face, the slick beady eyes, the ridiculous Peter Graves from Mission Impossible haircut, you just have to ask yourself is good old salamander face right? Is the beginning of World War III?
 
    And, rest assured dear Toddshow listeners, we're not at the beginning of World War III - we're way past it. You see, World War III already happened. 
 
    You see, on July 13, 2006, son of Satan himself Bill O'Reilly said that we were already said that World War III had started. But, compare this with the July 10, 2006 edition of the Fox Big Story show where Mr. Personality himself, John Gibson interviewed a guy named interviewed Michael Ledeen, resident scholar at the American Enterprise Institute (AEI), and said "some are calling the global war on terror something else, something more like World War III." But Ledeen responded that "it's more like World War IV because there was a Cold War, which was certainly a world war." Ledeen added that "probably the start of it [World War IV] was the Iranian revolution of 1979."
 
    Ok, fine, so we're up to World War IV? Right? Apparently frigging not. On the July 13 edition of his nationally syndicated radio show, Fox News host Sean Hannity declared: "we are loaded up today, as the Middle East on the brink of World War V, here."

    Look, we could talk all day about whether or not Israel has the right to bomb the Hezbollah back to the caveman days until Hezbollah stops lobbing missiles into downtown Haifa. And we could talk all day whether its right for Iran to arm Hezbollah or whether its right for the US to arm Israel....and we can talk all day whether Oprah is gay. Personally, I don't think she is, but that doesn't mean that I don't think that she hasn't had some wild and crazy nights in college that she may not remember, but hey, live and let live right? 
    
    Because if you take Gingrich, Gibson, and Hannity and really look at them, they are just nothing more than pawns for the whole conservative movement that knows that we are coming up to a very big election this fall, and there is nothing more that will get people buzzing than World War V. I mean these guys are starting to run out of ideas. Because as Rocky V proved, once you've gotten up to V sequels, the whole concept has pretty much jumped the shark, and lets be honest Sylvester Stallone beating up Tommy Gunn in the streets had as much credibility as Newt's whole contract with America.
 
    But the end of the day, people like Gingrich, Gibson and Hannity, aren't just considered conservatives, they are considered neoconservative, with the term "neo" not just meaning Keanu Reeves in the Matrix, but a whole form of "new wave" conservativism that is not exactly the same as isolationism, and is step to the left of cavemanism, and a little to the right of botulism, and for neocons to really get their message out, they need you to be scared
 
    Now, I'm not going to go as far as saying that neocons and terrorists have any kind of connection, and certainly some of my best friends may have conservative tendencies, but lets face it, they both like to drop bombs. Terrorists, like hezbollah, drop bombs in public places and kill a lot of innocent people. Neocons like to drop bombs like World War V into civilized arguments and serious discussions and make every attempt to clear the room quicker than one of my brother's farts.
 
    For these morons to start throwing around terms like Armageddon while you and I are flicking around the tv trying something more interesting to watch than a repeat of Sponge Bob Poop Pants, is just plain wrong. Because this isn't the beginning of World War V, this is the beginning of World War Five Million, because if the history of Israel and Lebanon has shown us that these two neighbors get along as Paris Hilton and Nicole Ritchie. Just two many similarities between them but too many bad vibes to make it all just work out.
 
    Until jerks like Hannity and Gingrich can all get on the same page, and figure out which war I'm supposed to be hiding under the bed from, I'm just gonna go back to something really scary - Big Momma's House 2....

 

The night before a trial is a smart time to do a podcast, but it'll all work out fine. At least, I think it will. On the show, I played:

1. Rock Down Baby
2. Josh Woodward
3. Id Guiness
4. Psychic Hearts
5. Testosterone
6. Vittoria Conn

Also, helping out with this show was John Wall from the M-Show, the Geoff Smith, Tangential Cold....and big plug for Rutter's Ramblings and The Rubberoom.

Happy 4th of July. I can't believe that this show started on New Year's Day and we're already here. I hope everyone has a great day, and celebrates safely. On the show, I played:

1. Sophia Ramos
2. The High
3. Jesta
4. Little Fish Small Pond
5. Jeremy Kushnier

 Also, a little bit of Juggling Suns for you...

New opening music brings a renewed spirit. I am ready to have some fun. On the show, I played:

1. The Golden Gods
2. John Keenan
3. Victor DiMarko
4. Force Theory Productions
5. Whiskey River Band
6. David Ippolito

Early morning podcasts are the best. Wake up and rock out, what a way to start the day. On this show, I played:

1. Tris McCall
2. Readymade Breakup
3. 7L and Esoteric
4. Jeremy Rowe
5. Cofield Mundi

Also, check out Procrasticast who had Jeremy Rowe on for a long interview.

A quick message regarding the Studio C Podcast

Jay-Z has really pissed me off, and on this show, you'll find out the cause. You'll also hear some great music from:

1. Rock Kills Kid
2. J. Carpenter
3. Chomsky
4. Colie Brice
5. Omer Leshem

Go help out Phil Ayoub and Agency when you get a chance. Also, here is the link to Ande Smallwood and his World Cup Cast.

Background music for the Wanderer segment provided by Marco Esu on the Podsafe Music Network

The reasons are pretty simple. This time its personal. Ring the bell. We're looking for a fight. On the show, I played:

1. Tris McCall
2. Antonin Bastian
3. The Hush Sound
4. Jerzy Jung
5. Michael E. Thomas Band
6. The Living End 

I have tried since January to come up with a promo that you could be proud of. I think we accomplished this tonight. Special thanks to Marta and Ken, Matthew Ebel, and Brian Noe.

On this very episode we celebrate artists who have only recently embraced podcasting. All of these artists are enjoying their podcast debuts (except the first and the last - hey, nothing's perfect!):

1. Fight
2. Porter Block
3. Mark LaForme
4. Matt Harmon
5. missFlag
6. Gasoline

A special tribute to Vince Welnick

and I get to talk about the Department of Homeland Security

Click here for the episode

It's a great day to podcast. You can hear it - I am really happy during this show. On the show tonight, I played:

1. Pralay
2. The Hesh, Inc.
3. Kevin Burdick
4. Joe Thomasefski
5. Chutzpah

...and I talk about Lance Armstrong

Get the show here

Happy Memorial Day. I had way too much trouble deciding what songs to play on this show. I am happy that I chose the following!

1. Jupiter Sunrise
2. Mike Zuko
3. Stacie Rose
4. Anthony Fiumano
5. Geoff Smith

...and, I talk about Hillary Clinton....

...and for some reason I need to post this for the folks at Odeo... My Odeo Channel (odeo/6bc72fc9fdd42067)

Click here to get the show

I'm feeling good tonight. All from the allergist's samples and a glass of something. On the show, I played

1. The Flashcubes
2. Testosterone
3. The Damn Truth
4. The Bulldogs
5. Janey Todd

I also talked about English as the "official language" of the US

Its the start of Summer in New Jersey, at least that's what its starting to feel like. As such, I wanted to play some summertime music, including:

1. Juggling Suns
2. Lee Coulter
3. The Undercover Hippy
4. The Alice Project
5. Kevin Reeves
6. Art Linton

Also, I mentioned that I got up and went to LeTip this morning. Too damn early in the morning, but great to grow your business.

Finally, I'm starting to mention the rant on the website - so on this show, I took on Second Life.

Podcasting on a Friday night? Cool!

Welcome to your Friday Night Rock Party. No matter when you hear it, the music on this show is a lot of fun. This included:

1. The Failures
2. Pilfa Confession Box
3. Danko Jones
4. Jim Testa
5. Brendan Benson
6. Mike Rocket and the Stars

A mellower Jersey Todd for a Monday night, but as always, we put out some rocking music, including:

1. Lorin Swelk Orchestra
2. What About Frank?
3. Dipsomaniacs
4. Kevin Burdick - make sure you watch his bio video
5. Lorena Mire

Jersey artists, sports reporters, middle-school podcasts, rap music, and big broadway voices - this show has got it all.

On the show, I played:

1. Hutch
2. Jon Caspi
3. Jet Vicious
4. Rayko Pipes and the KRB
5. Cassandra Kubinski

We also announce the winner of the Danko Jones contest, and so much more.

I know, I missed the Wednesday episode for you. I've been crazy busy. But, not today! Today, I have got such a great show for you, with music by:

1. Munk
2. Page 6
3. Motion Soundtrack
4. Michelle Lewis
5. Colie Brice and Rick Barry

 We also had some special help from the great Ding Mao

Download the show here

The show following the Trenton Computer Festival, is bound to have its ups and downs. Hopefully, we're clear of any technical problems. On the show, I played:

1. Black Lab
2. Pistol Opera
3. The Alice Project
4. The Clintons
5. Phil Ayoub

Don't you want to win the Danko Jones' CD?

Download the show here

The Cha-cha's stitches are out, work is good, and things are back to normal. On the show, I played:

1. The Gentlemen
2. Billy
3. Matt Caplan
4. The Ivy League
5. Allison Crowe

Don't forget to check out "Its all about Marta and Me" and to enter our Danko Jones contest.

Download the show here

 

Wow, a couple of days off and I'm ready to rock. On the show, I played:

1. Mates of State
2. Nada Surf
3. Blame Amy
4. Phil Ayoub
5. Sweet P

Doesn't anyone want to win a copy of Danko Jones' new cd? If you do, send me a note and be entered in our big contest....

Download the show here

Well, we weren't able to get a show out on Wednesday. But, I have a pretty good excuse. Everyone is fine now. On the show I played:

1. Munk
2. Trouble Club
3. Artificial Intelligence in Texas
4. Katy Pfaffl
5. Bill Janowitz and Crown Victoria

Also, I announced our Danko Jones contest.

Download the show here

A fun show - hopefully all of the technical issues have resolved. On the show, I played:

1. Heavy Mojo
2. Love Death Dreams
3. Artificial Intelligence in Texas
4. Adama
5. Metamorphasis

 

Also, be sure to keep your eyes on the Quazatoli Connection

Download the show here

 

I had some problems posting this show. Hopefully, it made it to you ok. If not, please let me know. On the show, I played:

1. Scamper
2. John Taglieri
3. Kathy Phillips
4. Radio Havana

 

Download the show here

Once again, the eyes of the world turn to the French. You see France has brought us great art. France has brought us great cuisine, and france has brought us wonderful additions to our culture. You know why the French can bring us art, culture and cuisine? Because the French are a bunch of lazy bums who'd rather throw some paint up on the wall, or burn some eggs, or play dress up with some ugly ass rags that people are expected to consider to be high fashion rather than going out and get a job.

 

The one thing that the French are really good at lately - is rioting. The French excel in riots. If there were an olympics of rioting, if there were a world cup of rioting the French would absolutely come in - second place. The Palenstenians are the world champs of riots, but thats a discussion for another day. Because, the French are really really good at rioting and they seem to be well on their way to be winning the award for Most Improved Rioter award. I think Dennis Rodman won in in 1996, but I'm not sure.

 

So, what's the French's problem, this week. Let me break it down for you. You see I think the media has been extremely generous about this story. Our media has turned such a blind eye on this one, that they make Katie Holmes' parents look like Ozzie and Harriet. Like Bill Buckner on 1st base in the 1986 World Series, the US Media has absolutely dropped the ball on this one.

 

You see the reason the French are rioting is because their government passed a law that would allow an employer to fire a worker for any reason during a 2 year period. Now certainly they have some sort of French laws against discrimination based on sex, race, or religion. If they don't they should. But, assuming that they do, this law essentially comes down to someone taking a job, and thinking that they are doing a good job, but if they aren't or the boss just doesn't think that they are fitting in, the boss can let them go. However, after two years of keeping their head down, doing a good job, and working to the companie's satisfaction - they get a job that is given more protection than Michael Jackson's stash of kiddie porn.

 

The real problem is that the French are socialists, and darn it to hell this hole concept of working hard to better yourself is really confusing to them. Why bust your chops when the rest of the country can collectively pick up your slack.

 

I'm as liberal as they come. I believe in individual expression, individual liberties, and minimal government intrusion. I believe what's yours is yours and what mine is mine and government should be involved in my life as Mr. Belvidere. Something in the background that if I need you I'll call you, but make sure the roads are working right and the lights stay on and the police put the bad guys away and keep the schools running. Other than that - government, I pay you reasonable taxes, you give me reasonable service.

 

However, socialism is a whole nother problem all togehter. According to the Socialist Action Website,  The root word of socialism is the world 'social' – and that's the most important thing to remember about socialism. Basically socialism is the belief that what is socially produced should be socially owned. In other words, if hundreds of people come together to produce a factory, it shouldn't then become the sole property of one person. Socialists hold that production should be based on human need, not profit.

 

You know who never agrees with socialism - the guy who owns the factory. And maybe socialism has some interesting ideas, its a philosophy that would only work for ants....maybe mormons....but definately ants.

 

And if France wants to give it a whirl for another hundred years, c'est le vie. But the problem is that the wheels are starting to fall off. When workers think of employment as an entitlement rather than a privilege then nobody wins. Just as the workers in the factory don't like it that the boss holds all of the means of production and means of capital, I think nobody in the factory wants to work with the fat, lazy, guy who's sitting in the corner having his croissant and coffee and can't be fired because some union representative says that they've got a contract guarunteeing employment.

 

More importantly, what does socialism do for  the fat lazy guy. Do you think he's ever going to get to where he needs to be in life. Let me tell you a story, a few years ago, I worked for an absolute jerk of a boss, he had me working all day Saturdays, he'd send me to Court with the worst files in the bin and then yell at me when I lost with the discovery he provided, and then after a year of fun and excitement, he let me go because he couldn't afford me any more. And at the time, I was scared, I was devistated, and I was lost. I was out of work for two months, and during that time I met my wife, got another job, and put me on the road to where I am today. It was probably the best thing that happened to me

 

So to the French, I say this - do not fear being fired. Do not fear being let go, sacked, or even given a pink slipped. You might find a new interest, a new career. It'll give you a chance to hone up on your interview skills...and oh yeah, it might even give you an excuse to take a shower.

 

The title speaks for itself - but the show got out....

On the show, I played the music of:

• Anti-Hero
• The Five Percent
• Days Awake
• The Lingus

Listen to the show here

When it was all said and done, I think this was a great show. A little fired up, not entirely worksafe, but a whole lot of fun. On the show, I played:

• Will Hoge
• St. Christopher
• The Needles
• Aloud

I'm digging this new text editor that Libsyn is providing. Much easier way to do show notes!  

Get the show here 

Today on the show, I've chosen to only play artists that you can't find anywhere else. We are recomitted, reinvigorated, recharged, and resolute in our desire to play you great independent music. So, today on the show, I played:

 

1. Tonya Watts
2. Ruth Gerson
3. John Taglieri
4. Aloud
5. Rick Barry

Background music at the top of the show was provided by DJ Topshelf
Get the show by clicking here

Wow - had a tough tough time getting this show up and together. However, we perservered, and came up with very entertaining show:

 

Rick Barry
Danko Jones
Lori Malvey

I also mentioned the Get Jacked and Luna Musings podcasts. Go check them out.

Check out the show here

Well, I taped the West Wing, Soprano's, and Gray's Anatomy, because I'd rather be podcasting.....

 

Tonight on the show, I played:
Laura Cheadle - now, go ahead and vote for Laura
Richard Barone
Superbeing
Sean Mormelo


Ok, David Ippolito fans. I guess you're here because of the big news. Well, check this out. I guess things are starting to get sirius between us....

Listen to the show here

Well, Syracuse is out of the tourney already - a good run while it lasted. I can't ask for much more.

 

I was pretty hyper while recording this show - the power of podcasting! Tonight, I played:

 

The Shades of Gray
David Ippolito
Martha's Trouble
Supergene
Murder the Stout

Listen to the show here

I was feeling good today - Go Syracuse!

I played:
Joe Strummer and the Mescalaros
John Keenan
Blackalicious
The Embers


Also, this is the link to CC Chapman's MS Walk page for Amanda of the Biddies. Go there now

Listen to the show here

For some reason, I was fired up tonight, with a lot on my mind and not a lot of time to say it. However, I was able to play for you:

 

Pets in Trees
Scamper
Dann Kidd
People Coyote with special interview segment
Simon Scuddamore

Of course, it was finally time to discuss the The Sopranos

Download the show here

The 1st show following the big Daily Source Code appearance. On the show, I played:

Jeff Vidov
Anthony Hugh
Geoff Smith
David Ippolito

I also spoke about the situation with Waxy.Org and the problems Bill Cosby is causing regarding some parody sketches entitled "House of Cosby's"

 

The more I think about it, the more angry I get.

Play the show here

Your working class hero keeps on podcasting despite a bit of the day-care flu. You wouldn't even know it in hearing the show! Tonight I played:
Jessy Moss
People Coyote
On Tracy Lane
John Keenan

Also, if you had any trouble downloading the show, please let me know, as I had some problems getting it up to Libsyn this morning, but it appears to be fixed.

Download the show or play it HERE

The Rock Show - All of these songs guaranteed to move your feet, and get you going. I know they did for me.

 

On the show, I played:
The Joint Conspiracy
Clip
The Radio Knives
Encounter of East West Records

Play or download the show here

Sometimes the name of the show, pretty much sum up the show notes. I played:
Parlor Dames
John Raido
Brick Daniels
Adam Wyle

...and Mr. Eric Idle as first played by the Whole Lot of Nonsense Podcast

Hey we made it - ten shows!

On the show, I played:
Hey Gravity
Jim Testa
Rinaldi Sings
SG-Lad

This was a lot of fun. Four songs from a great, great New Jersey label, Aeria records.

On the show, I played:

St. Christopher
Agency
Mark Prescott
Cole Brice

AGENCY AT THE WONDER BAR
MARCH 4, 2006
graphic c. Joe Harvard 2006

Did you think a Jersey podcast wouldn't ever have this subject? Bruce Springsteen is the music of my childhood, my adolesence, and my present. If ever a singer could provide a "soundtrack" to a life, its been Bruce and the gang for me. On this particular episode, I look into the artists who have also been influenced by the "Boss". This includes:

John Romano
Scott Andrew
Colie Brice of Aeria Records
Charles Tanton
Matthew Ebel


Check out New Joisey's own Aeria records...

A very loose, very up show.... As promised, here is the letter I send out to artists, please feel free to use it as you see fit:

"Hey there... I discovered your music while playing around with Cd-baby, its some really cool stuff. I don't know if you have considered letting podcasters play your music.

There is a website called the "Podsafe Music Network" which allows artists to upload a track or two, and then podcasters can find it and play the music on their shows. The site is music.podshow.com (no www) It does not provide any ownership rights, and allows for great music, like yours, to find new ears.

In the last couple of months, I've given up completely on commercial radio and have been listening exclusively to the music that I find on podcasts. If you've never listened to a podcast, I highly recommend two, Accident Hash and the Daily Source Code

You don't need an IPod to play a podcast - just a computer! So, if you get a chance, check out music.podshow.com If you have any questions regarding podcasts, feel free to ask. In fact, I've been bitten by the bug so badly that I've started my own show - The Jersey Toddshow I'd love to be able to play your music on my show."

Also on the show I played:
Spymob
Jake Coco
Patty Hurst Shifter

While you're here, drop me a line hello...

You say you want an evolution...Today on the show I give my "State of Podcasting" address.

I also played the music of:

Terri Hendrix
Stefanie Seskin
Belt
Goodwin

Enjoy the game everybody!

A more mellow show than our last one. But hey, could anything be more amped than that last show?

On the show, I talk about the Oscar nominations, and more specifically, Matt Dillon

Go to this website, if you dare....

On the show, I played the music of:
Thaddeus Hogarth
Mark Prescott
The Lascivious Biddies
Steve Wynn

Thanks for checking out the website. While you're here, why not drop me a line...

Too much coffee for a Sunday afternoon, but I was in the mood to rock.

 

On today's show I talked about David Lee Roth

 

I also played the music of:

 

Goodwin
Stereotactic
Headrush
American Heartbreak

 

Special thanks to Dave for the great new bumper music. Check out his website and album

 

In 1984, I was 13 years old, and I was a man. I started making my own decisions, and as a man, I chose to do something very important. I joined the Van Halen fan club. Three months from my initial application to Geffen Records, my application was granted and I was sent an official fan club packet. This included a membership card, a patch, a headband, and a glossy folder containing pictures of Diamond Dave, Eddie, Marc Anthony, and Alex. In retrospect, those pictures, like many of my hard rock icons of the 80's now seem very, very gay.

 

            In retrospect, it was a lousy deal compared to the world today. There were no newsletters, no meetings, no discounts, and really no benefit to being a member of the fan club, other than to say that you were a member, and as best as I can remember it, at 13-years old in 1984, that was a very cool thing.

 

            At the same time, I was already a huge fan of Sammy Hagar. The Red Rocker. One-Two-Three Lock Box. VOA. I Can't Drive 55. I was about as big a moron fan for Sammy Hagar as I was for Van Halen. Yes, I even bought the HSAS album that Sammy put out as a benefit album. Oh you don't remember HSAS – Hagar Schon Aaronson and Shrieve. I was also a huge Journey fan, but that's a story for another day. But remember, if he ever hurts you, you know true love won't desert you…

 

            So when Diamond Dave went solo my sophomore year of high school and Sammy Hagar joined Van Halen, this was a fine compromise by me. I mean baseball teams trade players all the time, so why couldn't one of my favorite free agents join my favorite team, and Diamond Dave go out and create his own supergroup made up of Steve Vai and Billy Sheenan, and all could be alright in the world.

 

            I even met Diamond Dave. For eight summers, I worked at the Garden State Arts Center as a Security Guard. Yes, given that I wrestled at 105-lbs my freshman year of high school, having me working as a security guard is one of those things that could only happen in New Jersey. However, because I had a big mouth and would work 18-hour shifts, I was often assigned to sit back stage where I could listen to concerts, read a book, swipe food from the dressing rooms, and get time and a half, so long as I check the locks or made sure that if somebody got passed the ten other security guards that were stationed before my location that they didn't get past me. In otherwords, it was a perfect job.

 

            So, the night of David Lee Roth played the Garden State Arts Center I was pretty psyched up. Extreme was the opening act, and I remember they had just played that very cool song from Bill and Ted's excellent adventure. Anyway, I was back stage in the hallway, and then I saw him. Now, you know in the Panama video Dave was running around with a sword and doing karate moves and looking generally cool. Ok, lets be honest. That's not the same guy up close.

 

            He was about 5' 5', skinny, and even back then was noticeably going bald. This was not a bad ass. He came up to me and gave me his best, "Hey kid, how do you kill an hour in this town." Now please understand, this was suburban Holmdel, New Jersey, and I said what came to mind – "Mr. Roth, in an hour, you pretty much could see the whole town." He said, "I like you kid, you're alright, bose de bose de bop, biddy bop" and shuffled away, and that was my last impression of David Lee Roth

 

            Until now, you see recently David Lee Roth recently replaced Howard Stern. Now, don't get me wrong, I am not a Stern fan. In fact, I don't really think he's overly funny or creative. I think pound for pound, mano a mano, Pepsi Challenge with no preexisting impressions of skill, the Pacific Coast Hellway blows Howard out of the water on a daily basis. And frankly, if given a fair fight, I think Opie and Anthony would have cleaned his clock in New York. But again, I digress.

 

            I took a break from Podcasts this morning to check DLR out. Oh my lord, this was a travesty. David Lee Roth could not carry the little jock that Stern has. It is like watching Steve Balboni replacing Reggie Jackson, like Dick York replacing Dick Sergent on I Dream of Jeannie, it was as bad as Kevin Seal being replaced by Adam Curry on Headbangers Ball. Damm it, I was a Kevin Seal fan. Whatever happened to him. Kevin Seal – the Don Vincente to Adam Curry's Don Corleone, but again I digreess.

 

            What winner thought that this would work. David Lee Roth on the radio makes as much sense as Martha Stewart at a truck race, Pauly Shore at a MENSA meeting, and those guys from Diggnation showing up at a porn convention for straight couples.

 

            During the half hour that I listened to his show, Dave revealed himself to be what I always thought he would be a complete moron. There was nothing on his show that was vaguely coherent, interesting, or for that matter funny. Dave was as politically lucid as my cats are, and they at least read Slate magazine's web site. Ultimately, he just sounds like what he is, another aging rock star trying to milk that last drop of milk out of fame's teet. These are the same radio executives that think that Bo Bice is edgy.

 

            So, Dave, sometime soon, and I hope its very soon, its Bumpa-Deeda, Bumpa-Deeda Happy Trails To You, Until We Meet Again, and it's a shame too, because I thought the radio would've worked – because who really needs to see a 65-year old in assless chaps?

Today on the show, I was honored to play the great music of Terri Hendrix

 

Then, I talked about two stories out of New Jersey. First, the wonderful idea to put iris scanners in Freehold. Here's a link to the story

 

I also talked about the high school student from New Jersey who wants to wear a skirt to school. Here is a link to that story.

 

On the show, along with Terri Hendrix,I played:
Bill
(this is the album cover for their album, Birthday Suit)

Rinaldi Sings
Slim

I also put a plug in for the terrific Madtown Aces Productions

Click here to get the show

I talk about Anna Benson. I'm not going to put up a picture of her because that is what she'd want me to do. Check out her website at Anna Benson

 

On the show, I played:
Paperboy Jack
Ari Shine
Tom Robinson
Roadside Zoo

Click here to get the show

Screw the RIAA! On this podcast, I talk about my feelings toward the absolutely ridiculous lawsuits that are being filed by the RIAA against those accused of downloading music. I also mentioned Patti Santangelo. I encourage you to check out some more information about her.

 

The Patti Santangelo Defense Page

This is a really scary page Recording Industry v. People

On the show I played the following:

Blue Number Nine
Valley Lodge
Miles Partridge
Justin Roth

I really hope that you enjoyed the show and thanks again for checking out the site. Drop me a line or sign on to the Frappr map on the side of the page.

Get the show here

This feels gooood....on the show I played the following:
Jeremy Kushnier
50 Foot Wave
Matthew Ebel
The Golden Gods

I really appreciate that you checked out the show, if you have any comments, I certainly would love to hear from you!

Here we go, the 1st podcast - sort of. This one is definately not ready for primetime, but I want to get this one going and see how it feels...so thanks for checking it out, but there is going to be soooo much more to come.... On the show, I played Blue Number Nine